


All You Had To Do Was Stay

by AnxiousCupcake



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Alternate Reality, Angst, Canon Divergence, Drama, Jealousy, NOT a love triangle, No Strings Attached, Post-Tartaros Arc (Fairy Tail), Romance, jealous Natsu, sting and lucy are fuck buddies, sting is protective of lucy but NOT in love with her
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-13
Updated: 2019-10-11
Packaged: 2020-10-17 14:42:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 20,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20622740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnxiousCupcake/pseuds/AnxiousCupcake
Summary: After Natsu returns from a year of training, Natsu struggles to come terms with changes he couldn't have possibly imagined. Fairy Tail is gone, Lucy has joined Sabretooth and he’d never have dreamt of it, but she also has a new “friend” - Sting; the two are more or less in a 'no-strings attached' relationship.





	1. Sabretooth

**Author's Note:**

> PLease give this a chance. Pleathe. And leave me reviews and let me know what you think.

* * *

**_Chapter 1 - Sabretooth_**

* * *

The heat felt all too familiar. She didn’t want to be imagining things, but there was no mistaking it; he was back. And though she should’ve expected it, he did say he would be back in a year, she didn’t really think he’d hold up that end of his promise. Everyone was gone and she was only starting to get used to it, a whole year afterwards; so _ he _ was part of the group she was used to just being… _ gone. _

Didn’t mean she didn’t hurt over it. She did. But she had just started to accept that they were _ all _gone. But here he was, standing down there, grinning up at her as if nothing had happened. She wanted to laugh, because that was so typical of him, but she also wanted to punch him real hard in the face for all the anguish that he had caused her. 

Her hands still crossed in front of her chest, her feeling of horror at her almost nude state fades. She lowers her gaze and sighs softly before turning around and leaving. 

* * *

Natsu is surprised at her reaction. He watches her leave, confused. There was so much he couldn’t understand. He’d visited her apartment first, only to find that it was empty. It had been empty for quite a while, he could tell. He’d gone to the guildhall to see that it was never rebuilt, and it annoyed him that nobody bothered to leave a note of change of address. So when he’d heard of the Grand Magic Games, he had decided to pay a visit, sure he’d find everyone there along with some answers. But he couldn’t find anyone and now all he had were more questions. 

_ Had she moved out of Magnolia? _

_ Where on Earthland had Fairy Tail relocated to? _

_ Why couldn’t he catch the scent of any of his other guildmates? _

He is reminded of his situation when hears the clanking of metal armours and heavy footsteps. He looks around and spots the Royal Guard, and really, that was the last of his worries. Using the dust he’d kicked up as cover, he separates out Lucy’s distinct scent and follows.

He spots her blonde head a couple of metres from the gate of the Domus Flau, and he starts to break into a run but slows down as he nears her. She’s talking to someone he recognises, but it was not one of his guildmates. _ Sting. _That makes him frown. 

As he walks towards them, Sting looks up meeting his eyes immediately, a frown on his face that mirrored his own.

* * *

Lucy walks out of the Domus Flau, coughing from all the smoke she’d had to inhale on her way out. The idiot really just melted the whole arena, she muses. No doubt that his powers had grown exponentially. She snorts at the thought, at least that meant he really was off training this last one year. 

As she finally inhales a lungful of clean air, she pauses her brisk walk, her hands going on her knees as she tries to catch a breath. As if on cue, Virgo appears with a clean pair of clothes. Lucy thanks her, ignoring Virgo’s comment about Lucy’s state making her want to be punished.

Just as she slips into the overcoat, she hears a familiar voice. “Lucy!” 

She buttons up the powder blue coat before turning to wave. “Hey, Sting!” 

“I heard about the...fire…” he says, breathing a sigh of relief before engulfing her in a hug. “Damn, I leave for an hour and… _ chaos _,” he says, incredulously, his eyes taking in the sigh of the partially melted Domus Flau.

“I’m okay,” she says, reassuringly as he takes a step back. 

“Where are the others?” he asks, nose up trying to catch a whiff of the rest of his guildmates. 

“I was sure they were behind me,” she says, frowning, starting to worry a little bit. 

Sensing her worry, he gives her friendly bump on the soldier. “Hey, we’re Sabretooth. I’m sure they’re okay.”

She gives him a small smile, but sighs knowingly as he frowns suddenly and inhales deeply. “Is that…”

She looks at his face when he stops mid-sentence to see that he was looking over her shoulder with a frown. She already knows who he’s looking at and she really doesn’t want to turn around right now. It gives her a mild headache, but she does, to see Natsu stomping towards them with a scowl on his face.

_ Boy, there was so much catching up to do _and she wasn’t sure if she was looking forward to that.

* * *

_ “Natsu, Fairy Tail is gone. Master disbanded it the day after you left.” _

_ “No way. I don’t believe it. This prank’s pretty stupid. It’s not gonna work on me.” _

Then she had looked exasperated and pulled down the collar of her jacket to show him her Sabretooth guildmark. His eyes had darted to her hand to see that the pink guildmark that once adorned it was no longer there. 

_ “They’re gone, Natsu,” she says sadly. He doesn’t miss the way Sting scooted a tiny bit closer to her and she leans into him. He looks away irritated. _

Now, they’re sat in a cafe at Crocus, grabbing a bite; well, Lucy was. The Dragon Slayers just had a feast; Natsu was chewing on his last chicken wing and Sting was finishing up his milkshake. 

Natsu sits across Lucy at the table, with Happy perched on his shoulder, and Sting is sitting right beside her, much to Natsu’s chagrin. _ Why is he even here. _

Lucy stares uncomfortably at Natsu, the only noise being the unnecessarily loud slurping of the coffee milkshake that Sting was having, gaze fixed coolly on Natsu. Natsu on the other hand, had his eyes trained on Lucy’s collarbone, where he could see the Sabretooth guildmark, blue in colour. He hated it. 

Grunting, he looks away again, still wracked by disbelief. It was hard to wrap his head around the idea that the place he had called home was just not there anymore. Too much had changed for his liking and he was determined that things went back to the way they were.

“Natsu?” says Lucy finally, unable to take the building tension. 

“I’m… just surprised,” he says in a clipped tone.

Lucy nods but then feels heat rush to her cheeks when Sting places a hand on her thigh under the table. She freezes for a second before swatting his hand away lightly.

Natsu looks up at that, eyes narrowing when he hears Lucy’s heartbeat pick up a little. Her cheeks are flushed pink and Sting makes a loud slurping noise as he takes a final sip and dramatically slams the empty glass on the table. 

“You guys good to go?” he asks, eyeing Natsu, who was now sitting in front of a multitude of empty dishes and then at Lucy, who’d had her regular vanilla milkshake and sandwich.

“Yeah, I’m done,” says Lucy and Natsu merely nods.

* * *

Ten minutes later, as they head out of the cafe, Natsu tells them he is staying at an inn down the road. Lucy, being who she was, insisted that she stay with him at the Sabretooth inn. The blond guildmaster reluctantly agrees seeing that she just wanted everything to be normal.

_ “Oh, come on, Sting _ . _ Natsu’s my friend,” _she’d said. 

_ “Fine. But no burning down anything,” _Sting had warned. 

As the three of them walk towards the inn so Natsu could get his stuff, Sting in the middle, he slips a hand around Lucy’s waist. She looks up at him curiously and is apprehensive when she sees a mischievous smile on his face. Sting’s hand slips under shirt and he grazes the skin of her hip with his thumb, making her face red again as she turns to glare at him.

Natsu, once again senses her increased habit and looks to see that her face was pink. He stops in front of a wooden building, practically coming apart at the seams before clearing his throat. 

“I’ll be down in a minute,” he says, before looking up at the sky to call to Happy, who joins him as they enter the inn. 

Once Natsu’s out of earshot and they were alone on the pavement, Lucy turns to Sting annoyed, resting her hands on her hips.

“What is _ wrong _with you!” she hisses at Sting. “You’ve never done that before!”

“I’m sorry, I was just messing with you,” holding both his hands up sheepishly. 

She huffs. “_ Bad. Timing. _”

“I couldn’t help myself,” Sting says mulishly. “I just wanted to piss him off somehow.”

“Piss him off…?” questions Lucy, blinking in confusion before she remembers Dragon Slayers’ super hearing. “_ Sting! _” she swats at his hand annoyedly. “How do you even know he’d get mad?”

“Once again…” says Sting, pointing to his ear. She scowls at him, raising her hands to smack him again, making him laugh before he gets serious and catches both of Lucy’s hands. “Are you okay, though? I know this can’t be easy for you…”

She sighs and her hands drop to her side as Sting lets go of them. “I… am okay.”

“Lucy…”

“I _ will _be okay. It’s strange that’s all,” she mutters. 

Sting stares at her for a few seconds, but relents with a sigh. “Fine. But you’ll tell me if-”

“-if something’s wrong? Of course, I will,” she says, shrugging. 

“Alright then,” says Sting, shoving his hands in his pocket. “I gotta go back to the Domus Flau to meet the organisers and other guildmasters to see how we’re gonna proceed with the Games. I can’t believe Natsu-san got away with it,” he says with a grimace.

“I can,” Lucy chuckles. “And what they want a meeting for? I doubt you can continue, the arena is…”

“I know, but I suppose this is a formality. They still gotta declare a winner,” says Sting. “Well, I’ll be off then.” 

Lucy nods and as he starts to walk away, after a second of hesitation she calls, “Will I be seeing you tonight?”

Sting stops in his tracks and his hand rubs the back of his neck nervously. “Lucy… Hey, I’m not complaining, but are you sure? I mean I would understand if you… Well, he’s back…”

Lucy purses her lips. “He made his choice. Loud and clear when he left with nothing but a note.”

Sting sighs. “If you’re sure.”

“I am,” she says, stubbornly.

“Fine. I guess, I’ll see you tonight then.”

“You will.”

“Okay, then.”

“Okay.”

And as he walks away, she feels an odd sense of satisfaction, even if it was only because she still felt like she had some control over some choices of her life. Maybe she didn’t have control over people she considered family abandoning her. Maybe not over the guy she had been practically in love with and was sure he felt the same way till he up and left. But this… this had been her choice. As had been joining Sabretooth. 

Her thought train was broken when she heard Natsu’s footsteps as he emerged from the rundown inn with a gigantic, loaded backpack, Happy right on his tail.

“Sting had some guild business to attend to,” explains Lucy, snapping out of it. “You ready to go?”

“Yep,” Natsu nods as he falls into step next to her. The two walk towards the inn Sabretooth was being housed. As they walk, Natsu’s quiet as Happy narrates their adventure. He occasionally shoots a look at Lucy, who has a small smile on her lips as she listens to Happy, even laughing once in a while. 

To say Natsu was perturbed would be an understatement. Lucy had not gone into the details, only that had left the morning after the guild was disbanded and that she had no idea where they went. Not even Levy, Erza or Gray. When she spoke about it, it left an uneasy feeling in his gut because he had been counting on Erza and Gray to stick around with Lucy after he left; _ the strongest team _in Fairy Tail. Lucy clearly didn’t want to talk about it more, and he let it go, deciding that he would get her talking later. 

Despite the resolve, the sinking feeling didn’t go away.

* * *

The inn Sabretooth was at was nothing like the luxurious building he’d seen the last time he’d practically burned the place down. It was still elegant, but a lot simpler. Happy was still yapping away to Lucy, and for once, Natsu was thankful because he was at a loss for words; he didn’t know what to say to her because despite her normal demeanour, there was something off. Like she was hiding something from him, a strange distance between them that he couldn’t quite fathom. 

His thoughts come to a halt when he hears the lock to Lucy’s door click open. He follows her in and the first thing that strikes him as odd is that he could smell an entirely different scent than that of Lucy’s in the suite. It’s almost everywhere. 

_ They are teammates, _ he reasons. _ And he’s the guildmaster. He’s bound to drop by often. _

She shows him to the couch, while promising Happy that she’d get him some fresh fish from the market tomorrow. Excited, Happy announces that he’d scour the city for the best of fish and flies out of the room, leaving Natsu and Lucy alone in the suite. His bag thunks on the floor and she cocks her head at him, unsure of what to say to her once best friend. 

_ What now? _Was all she could wonder, because honestly, there was nothing left to do. The guild was gone. Natsu couldn’t stay with her forever, but she couldn’t just ask him to get out of her life again either. Despite everything, he was still her friend, and she… cared.

“Luce?” he asks unsurely, as he sits on the couch, watching her watch him unseeingly for some time. 

“Hm?” she says, her eyes coming back into focus and looks at him questioningly.

“How… Have you been?” he asks unsurely, fidgeting nervously with his hands. 

“Uhh… Good,” she lies, her mind going back to that first two weeks that he’d left; the frequent visits to the pub so she could just forget what the emblem on her hand reminded her, but not really having the heart to remove it despite her mind constantly screaming _ “Abandoned!” _on repeat every time she looked at the pink symbol. Her hand absent-mindedly touches the golden chainlinks of the necklace on her neck, the cold metal is grounding her, as she stops herself from spiralling.

Her answer only makes his uneasiness grow as he watches her absent-mindedly touch a necklace around her neck, that didn’t used to be there before. The necklace is long and he can’t see the pendant as it disappears into her shirt, nestling between her breasts. The thought has his cheeks flaming and he shakes his head. 

The sun had already set and Lucy muttered something about taking a shower, leaving Natsu to his thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't worry, the drama's coming pretty soon. things will explode and then it'll be so fun.


	2. What Aren't You Telling Me?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't intend for this to be this long but here we are... I really appreciate everyone's support! I know the characters are a little out of character, but for the drama of it all, they must be. I felt like Lucy's abandonment issues were so easily glossed over in the series, so I'm sort of trying to deal with that too here. I hope you'll give this a chance till the end! I really hope the narration, pacing and the build-up makes sense.

* * *

**_Chapter 2 - What Aren't You Telling Me?_**

* * *

Sting rolls off of Lucy and the two of them breathe heavily, sweaty from their… nightly exercise. Well, it was evening now, but… that’s what everyone (who knew) called it now. _ Nightly exercise. _In all of the technical sense, it was very accurate. 

He glances at her sideways, watching her stare at the ceiling with a little frown. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” she murmurs. 

“Lucy…” he says, knowingly. “I know it’s bothering you…”

She groans and sits up in the bed, pulling the sheet over herself, crossing her arms to hold it in place as she leans against the headboard. “You’re so stubborn!” she says indignantly. “Let it go already!”

Sting gets up as well, sitting shoulder-to-shoulder with her. He doesn’t say anything but just stares at her intensely, till she grunts. Then, she looks at him with a scowl.

“_Fine. _ Of _ course _it’s bothering me. I don’t know what to do now. What am I supposed to tell him? What are we supposed to do? I can’t kick him out, he’s my friend and-”

“_Friend, _” chortles Sting. “Come on, Lucy, you need to get real-”

“Yes. _ Friend _ ,” repeats Lucy, glaring at him, before huffing. “We go back to Zinnia tomorrow, and then what? Will he join Sabretooth? Will he just… take off again? I mean, _ I _ wouldn’t put that beyond him seeing as he’s done that before and-”

“_Or_,” says Sting, cutting her off by bumping her shoulder lightly. “You could just… Talk to him,” he suggests.

“And say what? _ Hey, Natsu, I don’t know what to do now that you’re here, what are your plans? Do you want me to go with you or…?” _

“_Would _you go with him if he asks?” asks Sting, watching her intently.

“Huh?” blinks Lucy in confusion, and when Sting says nothing, she understands. “Oh. I… Don’t know.”

And then she starts to feel guilty. She shouldn’t even be considering leaving behind the people who were actually there for her in her time of need. Her hand goes to the gold chain around her neck again and she starts to play with it till Sting holds her fidgeting hand and tells her quietly. 

“I would understand if you went, you know?”

She gives him a small smile. “I know. But why should I… Honestly, this is not me being bitter, or petty. It’s just… why should I drop everything and leave when…” she trails, away with a small shake of her head. “It doesn’t matter anymore. It’s going to work out just fine. Natsu always finds a way. I know he’ll be fine without me,” she mutters.

Sting doesn’t look convinced but doesn’t challenge her either. “By the way, where does he think you are?”

“Uh… I don’t know? He wasn’t in the room when I got out of the shower,” she says, frowning a little and wondering again where he could possibly have gone.

* * *

A couple of hours later a tired Sting, an annoyed Lucy and an extremely energetic Natsu are walking out of the palace grounds, followed by a group of guards escorting them out. Once they’re at the gate, a guard tells them, “You’re lucky Princess Hisui is kind.”

“_ And _she’s my friend!” says Natsu cheekily, earning a sharp smack on the back of his head from Lucy. 

“I don’t know how you do it, Natsu-san,” sighs Sting as he leads them back to the guild. “You destroyed the Domus Flau _ and _vandalised the royal palace in the same day and all you get is being banned from the palace!”

“That’s a bummer, isn’t it?” Natsu frowns. “Well, I’ll make sure they’ll lift that soon enough,” says Natsu confidently, and Happy agrees with an ‘Aye, sir!’

“Oh, _ no _ you won’t!” says Lucy sharply, stopping and crossing her arms, glaring at Natsu. “One of the reasons you got away was because _ Sting _vouched for you! So, no you will do nothing of the kind,” she snaps. 

Natsu looks at her wide-eyed, both his hands up. “_ Hey, _I was only kidding!”

“Like I believe that!” Lucy replies with a scowl on her face. Then pointing her finger at his chest, and bringing her face closer, she continues. “You _ will _ stay away from the palace, _ forever _, you hear me! You can’t just do what you want, Natsu! It’s reckless and irresponsible!” she says angrily, and continues, “People. Get. Hurt,” each word punctuated by a jab in his chest. 

Natsu stares at her, very nervous now and feels sweat build up around his neck and loosens his scarf nervously. Happy is quiet as well, silent for once in his life. Lucy is still very close to him and he can see his own reflection in the brown pools of her rapidly watering eyes. He watches her face soften the second Sting tugs at her elbow, almost as if she snapped back to the present. 

She draws back suddenly and blinks away her tears, standing right in front of Sting. Rubbing her face with her hand, she inhales deeply. “You need to be more careful, Natsu…” she says softly this time.

Sting places a careful hand on her shoulder. “Lucy…?”

She steps away and shakes her head. “There are some errands I need to run. I’ll see you back at the inn,” she says abruptly and turns on her heel, walking away with a wave, leaving Natsu and Sting to stand there awkwardly. Natsu stares after her and looks at Happy, who is equally confused and then at Sting, who looks a little embarrassed. “Jeez, what was that about?” he asks Sting, because it hasn’t escaped him how he calmed her down. Something had definitely changed a lot more than he thought it did.

Sting respected Natsu; a lot. But to think he was this dense. He couldn’t be sure if Natsu-san was dense on purpose or if he was really just that blissfully ignorant of things. He opens his mouth to say something but decides against it; if Lucy wanted him to know or even understand what happened, she should tell him herself and _ he _should talk to her. It wasn’t his story to tell. 

“Uh, I don’t know,” lies Sting and when he sees a determined Natsu about to follow her, he lays a friendly, but firm hand on his shoulder, holding him back. “I would leave her alone, if I were you. She needs space.”

Natsu scowls at him, but relents, arms crossed tightly against his chest. The two of them start to walk towards the inn in silence, both of them lost in thought. 

If Sting was being honest with himself, he didn’t really mind Natsu much but he was definitely worried for Lucy. He remembers what she’d been like the first couple of weeks, always wanting to lay in bed or just getting drunk. He hadn’t been doing so well himself back then, as he was still recovering from Weisslogia’s death; his second death rather. He’d had to deal with the “knowledge” of having _ had _to kill Weisslogia for years, only to feel relieved that he hadn’t really killed his adoptive father. And then, he’d watched him die. It had all been too much. But hey, if he wasn’t busy getting piss drunk himself, he never would’ve been as close to Lucy as he is today. 

But he most definitely didn’t want to see her go back to that. He shoots a sideways glance at Natsu and he can see the genuine concern on his face. He is tempted to ask him why he’d left but keeps his mouth shut. Once again, not the conversation _ he _needed to be having. He just wants Lucy to be okay. She’s changed for the better this last year, and seems better adjusted; he didn’t think he would be able to stand by and watch that unravel.

* * *

Lucy walks the still bustling streets of Crocus quietly. She loves that about this big city; the city never slept, and for that she was thankful. It helps her to collect her thoughts, the low hum of the busy markets, the chatter of the people and the fresh scent of flowers.

She was upset with herself for snapping like that. She doesn’t want to think about the implications of that, but there was no denying it.

She’s still upset at what he did. 

Still hasn’t entirely forgiven it.

She still felt abandoned.

It frustrates her. She was supposed to be moving on, and yet she is still stuck where she was a year ago. To top this off, she wishes she could just be angry at him (and them) and get it over with. But she also felt guilt for her anger; everyone had a right to grieve what they had lost, and they had all lost so much. 

_ He had watched his father die _ . _ He had the right to leave. _

_ Yes, but... a note? _

_ Shut up! _

_ He could’ve said goodbye in person. _

_ Maybe it was too hard for him. _

_ Or maybe he just didn’t care enough. _

_ You know that’s not true. _

_ I don’t know, actually. _

_ You’re being selfish._

_Selfish!? I.. I destroyed Aquarius's key. To SAVE them. _Tears fill her eyes._ I lost so much of my magic, permanently. _

_They don't know that! You never told them any of that!_

_I tried to reach out... I tried._

_Maybe you didn't try hard enough. _

_UGH._

The voices were back. It’d been a never ending nightmare back then, and so far she had managed to constantly rationalise her feelings to and fro in what was apparently a delicate balance because here he was and just like that, the voices were back.

She halts her walking in front of a bar and stares up at the entrance, licking her lips nervously. She could smell the alcohol from where she stood. Her mouth cinches into a thin line as she feels her head starts to throb. 

_ I loved him. _

Her eyes tear up. 

_ And he just… left me. _

She wipes her tears and despite knowing she should head back to the inn, she found herself walking into the bar.

* * *

Natsu is wide awake, lying on the couch, on the armrest of which Happy is asleep, as he stares at the ceiling. It’s been a while since he’d come back to the room at the inn, and he’s starting to get worried. _ Errands _ , she had said. He should’ve followed her. _ Stupid Sting. _

His mind wanders as he thinks back to the events of the day. _ Fairy Tail was really gone. _He had really thought that Lucy would be a lot more excited to see him, but she seems so wary around him. Tired. It hurt him that she seemed to trust Sting more now; he hasn’t missed the concerned glances Sting kept throwing her way all day, or how close they were. The uneasy feeling from the evening returns, and deepens when he thinks about how she hasn’t mentioned a single one of their old guild members.

His thoughts are interrupted when he smells her and he sits up alert. He frowns; something’s different. He’s already at the door when he hears Sting’s voice from below.

“Lucy, have you been drinking again?”

Giggle. “I’m sorry…” Hic. “Were you up waiting for me?” Hic.

A sigh. 

“Aw no, are you mad? I swear it was supposed to be one.” Hic. “And then I got mad.” Hic. “So I got another one. And another.” Hic. “I’m sorry, Sting. I can make it up to you if you like.” Giggle.

“Whoa, Lucy… _ No. Put that down. _ You need to go to bed.”

_ What?? _

“M’kay,” a slurred reply. “Sorry.”

The voices get closer. 

“You just need some sleep now okay?”

They round the corner and Natsu sees Sting holding Lucy up on one side as he walks her towards her bedroom. Natsu hurries to lend his support as he takes her on the other side.

“Oh, look.” Hic. “It’s Natsu… Back after _ whoooole _year. HI Natsu. How have you been??” Sting winces and Natsu just murmurs that he’s been okay. 

She continues to babble all the way into her room and into the bed. Natsu backs off once she’s in bed but Sting is still talking to her and when he starts to change her clothes, Natsu starts to protest. 

“_ Hey _man, what’d ya think you’re doin’!”

“It’s okay, Natsu-san, I’ve done this before,” is all Sting says as he grabs a baggy grey t-shirt from her dresser and pulls it over her head as she holds her hands up for him. 

Five minutes later she’s all dressed up in her pajamas and lying in bed, drowsily when the two guys walk out of the room. 

“You’ll handle it from here?” asks Sting, looking at Natsu, a little tense and agitated.

Natsu nods. He runs a hand through his blond hair, and opens his mouth to say something but shakes his head, changing his mind.

“Well, okay, good,” is all he says instead before leaving the room.

Once the door shuts, Natsu walks to the bedroom again and he stands in the doorway, watching her. She’s not asleep. Instead, she is staring at the ceiling, a little lost, her hands playing with the golden chain around her neck. He stands there till her eyes flicker over to him and she starts to sit up, before groaning, a hand clutching her head.

Natsu walks over to her instead, looking at her worryingly. “Luce…”

“Natsu…” she says. 

He sits next to her, watching her as she stares back, and he sees the sadness in her eyes. “What aren’t you telling me??” he says softly.

Lucy giggles in response. “So much, silly.”

He is a little taken aback at her response. _ What else don’t I know? _He brushes the hair out of her face, tucking the gold strands behind her ear, tempted to ask her more. But he doesn’t. Maybe he’s afraid, or maybe he wants to have this conversation when she’s sober. He would definitely ask her, but now wasn’t the time. 

“I am sleepy…” she murmurs, as if on cue.

“Then go to sleep,” he says, 

“Maybe I will,” she sighs, allowing her eyes to droop as she relaxes completely. “Don’t leave again, ‘kay?”

“I… I won’t.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOW. That was... kind of corny, huh? I didn't proofread it cuz I was worried I'd want to scrap it, but it's sort of necessary. And I know I'm painting Natsu as sort of, dumb, but that's only for now. Please remember that he has no idea what happened. Yes the Aquarius thing will come up soon... And the other guild members will appear too. Soon-ish.
> 
> Let me know what you guys think, please?? It helps me navigate the story in a better way.


	3. Pajamas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m a vegetarian and have zero idea as to how bacon and eggs are made so in case of glaringly obviously wrong methods, pls forgive me lmao.

* * *

**_Chapter 3 - Pajamas_**

* * *

Lucy wakes up with a splitting headache, and remembers nothing about last night, starting from her 3rd shot of Fire Whiskey. She groans as the bright white sunlight hits her face, rubbing her eyes before she takes in her surroundings.

_ Inn. _

_ Grand Magic Games. _

_ … Natsu. _

She sits up slowly, blinking, wondering if it was a dream. It had to be. There was no way that he was back. She was a member of Sabretooth now, and she’s gotten over the fact that she felt abandoned. She nods to herself, trying to soak in the reassurance. But it doesn’t come. 

Slowly, she kicks off the blankets and sets her feet on the floor. Inhaling deeply, she stands up and sees a glass of water on the table and small vial of dark green liquid. _ Sting. _She starts to smile as she reaches for the glass and the hangover medicine, but the smile fades as she starts feeling guilty. 

_ Not again! I promised I wouldn’t do it. We’d both promised each other. _

She looks down at her clothes and finds herself in her pajamas, as well as in Sting’s grey shirt and realises that Sting had probably changed her. She sighs and rubs her head, trying to remember why she’d gone drinking in the first place, but comes up with a blank. _ I should ask, Sting _, she thinks sourly, downing her medicine, slightly remorseful. 

She hears shuffling outside her room, and thinks Sting was making her breakfast as he usually did after a night like the last one. Inhaling deeply, she prepares a mental speech to give to Sting in the form of an apology. Once again, she nods to herself and bracing herself for a scolding first, she marches into the living room, calling for Sting, only to come to a halt in shock.

* * *

Natsu had been woken up that morning by Sting. He had come to prepare what he dubbed as Lucy’s Hangover Menu, consisting of bacon and eggs, washed down by orange juice. Sting had walked in as if he owned the place, going to straight to the kitchen and opening the fridge before groaning about the lack of orange juice. Natsu had offered to make the breakfast if Sting would go get the juice, and Sting had agreed without hesitation; almost. Natsu hadn’t missed the brief look of nervousness as his eyes shot in the general direction of Lucy’s bedroom, before Sting agreed and promised to come back as soon as he possibly could.

As he starts to make breakfast his mind wanders again to how oddly comfortable Sting seemed here. He can’t help the twinge of jealousy that comes over him as he thinks about how much he used to hang out at Lucy’s apartment as well. He pauses as he considers his own reasons and wonders if Sting’s are the same. It can’t be… _ Unless?? _

His thoughts are interrupted when he hears the lock on Lucy’s door open, followed by a yawn as her slow steps approach the kitchen. She stops suddenly and he turns around to see her staring in the living room, eyes wide as she stares at him unblinkingly.

“Oh, hey, Luce!” says Natsu brightly, shuffling about in the kitchen. “You’re up! I made you some breakfast! Sting said you liked… er, bacon and eggs? Sting’s gone to get the orange juice, he’ll be here in a couple of minutes, though!”

She doesn’t respond, only stares at him as he starts to frown at her. 

“Earthland to Luce…?”

“You’re really here,” she grumbles, mostly to herself, in disbelief.

“Well, yeah,” he says, laughing in confusion, the queasy feeling from last night starting to creep in again. “I came yesterday, remember? And I, er-”

“Oh, I remember,” she says, realising that her ‘dreams’ were actually just memories from last night. Her legs feel weak and she sits on the arm of the couch behind her. “... the Domus Flau… and the… _ palace!?” _she finishes incredulously. 

Natsu’s eyes widen and he holds his hands up in front of him. “Whoa, Luce, uh, you already finished yelling at me about this? Last night…”

“Right…” she says, brows knitting into a frown. “I’m…” she starts, about to apologize for snapping at him, as she remembers what she’d said last night, but changes her mind. “...hungry,” she says instead, rubbing her upper arm as gets off the couch arm and makes her way past him to the kitchen island.

He follows her, nervous and he doesn’t even know why. He watches as she sits down on the stool with a thump and touches her forehead to the granite slab before groaning a little bit. “My head hurts…” she mumbles. 

“That’s what you get for drinking that much,” says Natsu trying to sound amused as he sets the plate o, because the question of when she’d started drinking (and why _ this much _) is what he is trying his best to keep himself from asking. She didn’t used to do that before, and had never shown interest either. He hasn’t forgotten the conversation he’d overheard last night...

_ “Lucy, have you been drinking again?” _ ** _Again._ **

_ Giggle. “I’m sorry…” Hic. “Were you up waiting for me?” Hic. _

_ A sigh. _

_ “Aw no, are you mad? I swear it was supposed to be one.” Hic. “And then I got mad.” Hic. _ ** _And then I got mad._ **

“Hey, Lucy…” he starts, wary as he walks over to sit across her on the opposite side of the kitchen island.

“Hm??” she asks, not looking up yet.

“I’m sorry I made you mad yesterday,” he says nervously, wondering if he should ask her if that was why she drank. That didn’t really seem like her. The uneasiness from last night returns as he sees her tense.

She lifts her head up, resting her chin on the granite slab as she looks at him. He’s watching her carefully, and she sees the uneasy look on his face, the guilt. She’s amused in a bittersweet way, that he still doesn’t see what he did as something wrong. Maybe she did in fact overreact back then. She’d read too much into a situation and maybe she only _ felt _wronged because of her feelings and what he did was-

….. And the raging debate was back and oh, what she wouldn’t do for a neat shot of whiskey right now. 

_ Ugh. This is unhealthy. _

_ Just end it already. _

Natsu watches her facial expressions change a mile a minute, but she still hasn’t responded to what he’d said. That was making him nervous and shift in his seat a little bit. She almost seemed lost in thought, eyes troubled as she drifted off in her thoughts and he couldn’t take it anymore.

“Luce?” he asks, his hand unthinkingly gliding across the cold granite to graze her cheeks. He feels her come to immediately and tense under his touch, but he doesn’t move. She’s looking at him warily, and he’s confused again by her reaction. She looks away a couple of seconds later, practically an inaudible sigh leaving her as she lifts her head off the granite and away from his touch, sitting up straight. 

“It wasn’t what you did last night, Natsu,” she says, slowly, carefully choosing her words as she looks at him. His hand remains where it was, but his fingers close into a tense wrist and she finds herself wondering how in the hell the atmosphere was suddenly this tense. 

What she’d said is technically not a lie. It wasn’t about what happened last night. She knows that her wording left room for questions, many questions, she could also see his expression change as he fully understood what she’d said; or tried to. And she instantly regrets her wording. She didn’t want to talk about it, and especially not to Natsu. She would surely have a breakdown. 

_ Please don’t ask me anything, let it go _, she prays. 

And he does. “Oh, okay then,” he says, looking away, troubled. There was more to it, there definitely was. He didn’t feel sure whether he wanted to know. Well, he did. But something tells him now wasn’t the time. 

He shakes his head, and goes to the plate the food he’d made and sets it in front of her. Smiling gratefully, she digs in, eyes widening as she tastes the food. “This is great!” she exclaims, munching quickly. “You’ve gotten a lot better.”

“Just you wait,” Natsu grins at her. “You ain’t seen nothin’ yet. I’ve learnt so much more this last year. And with your oven, I can-”

“That’s great, but I don’t have an oven, silly!” chuckles Lucy, between mouthfuls.

“I mean, here you don’t,” says Natsu. “But back in Magnolia you do. And when we-”

“Natsu, I don’t live in that apartment anymore,” says Lucy warily, setting her fork down as she looks at him. “I live at Zinnia City, where Sabretooth is.”

Pause.

“Yeah, I know that,” says Natsu slowly. “But you’ll obviously come back to Fairy Tail when-”

“Natsu,” says Lucy, inhaling deeply. “There _ is no Fairy Tail _to go back to.”

“Right now, there isn’t,” grins Natsu, completely oblivious to the raging turmoil in the woman in front of him. “They’ll all be back, you’ll see. After the message I left at the palace-”

“You think the guild will come back together?”

“I mean, yeah! I think my message was pretty clear. If they don’t, I’ll personally find them all and drag their asses back to Magnolia,” he says, proud of his plan. “You should come with me, Luce!”

“I’m not going anywhere,” says Lucy, trying to keep her voice from trembling. “And no one’s coming, Natsu. If they cared, they wouldn’t have left in the first place.”

Natsu is about to crack a joke when he sees the look on her face, a mixture of anguish and anger as she looks at him, completely sure of what she’d said. She was clearly convinced about what she’d said. 

“Luce…”

“_ They’re not coming back, Natsu,” _she repeats with emphasis. 

“How can you-”

“How can _ I _ ?” exclaims Lucy, her voice rising. “How could _ they? _ How could-” _ You. _

She stops mid-sentence, trying to reign in her temper. She closes her eyes briefly to collect her thoughts, and Natsu is taken aback completely at her sudden composure. He’d half been hoping that she’d explode, if only so she could tell him something, _ anything _, about what she seemed so desperate to hide from him. 

“The guild’s gone, Natsu,” she says again, this time calm and almost emotionless. “Everyone’s moved on. So should you. I know it’s hard. _ Boy _, do I know it’s hard. But it’s over.”

“We didn’t even try, Luce,” says Natsu, voice soft almost pleading.

Pause.

“I did,” she says softly. “I tried reaching out. But what happened after Tartaros took too heavy a toll on everyone. Everyone wanted to move on. And… That’s how it is.”

Lucy is teetering on the edge of asking him to join Sabretooth when the door opens and Sting walks in with nearly 4 cans of orange juice.

“Sorry, I’m late!” he says, rushing to close the door behind him. “They had to bring in a fresh stock as the last ones were nearly gone and there was a long cue which I-

He stops as he senses the tense atmosphere. He almost snorts to himself wondering what in the world Natsu-san had said again. He was powerful and everything but he really knew how to make Lucy mad. As his eyes go to her, he sees that she’s looking somewhat sad and approached her cautiously. “Hey, you okay?”

“Natsu here was saying how we should being the guild back together,” mutters Lucy. “And _ I _was telling him why that won’t work,” she finishes with a shrug as she grabs a bottle of orange juice out of Sting’s grip. 

As he sets the rest down he looks at Natsu questioningly who merely shrugs, really not wanting to get into it. Not with Sting, at least. Natsu didn’t really hate Sting. Not at all. But he had to admit, at least to himself, that he was… jealous of him. It’s driving him up the wall knowing that Sting probably knew something he didn’t. He also remembers how Sting had changed Lucy’s clothes last night, almost mechanically. _ “I’ve done this before,” _he had said. He also remembers how Lucy was completely at ease, compliantly holding her hands up for him to remove her shirt. It had left him feeling… jealous. It’s an unfamiliar feeling and Natsu doesn’t know what to do about it except avoid the person subject to his jealousy. 

His thoughts are interrupted by the sound of Lucy’s voice as she says to Sting, “And hey, by the way, thanks for the shirt. I’ll return it back to you, fully washed.”

He turns around to see Lucy tugging at the collar of the gray shirt as she chuckles at Sting sheepishly. Natsu is fully confused now, his brain going through some kind of a weird static phase as he tried to understand what was happening. _ His shirt? _

“Oh, right,” says Sting, looking sheepish himself. “Sorry I couldn’t get you into your own pajamas. I don’t know my way around your clothes here so the first thing I found when I opened the dresser was my shirt that I left here the other night.”

Lucy’s gaze immediately darts to Natsu’s face, and he wonders if he’d imagined the flicker of apprehension on her face as she nervously licks her lips before saying quickly, “We were all playing a game of… cards the other night so I spilled some wine and stained this gray shirt which Sting was wearing _ on him _at the time so I promised to wash it for him and didn’t return it ever since,” she babbles, ignoring the narrow eyed gaze Sting was shooting at her.

“Right,” is all Natsu says, because he can hear her heart racing and knows she’s lying. Why would she lie about this? His eyes flicker to Sting, who is now gazing at him steadily and Natsu knows that Sting knows that he could hear the lie. However, Sting offers no explanation, and instead turns to Lucy. 

“Hey, I gotta get tickets for our return to Zinnia City this afternoon,” he says calmly, while looking at her pointedly. “Wanna come with?”

“I didn’t even take a shower yet,” mutters Lucy, but Sting ignores her as he clasps her hand and starts to take her out the door. 

“Aw, that’s too bad, the station’s close by and if we manage to get there in ten minutes, we can get the discounted tickets. And there's also some, er, planning I need your help with," he continues, as they disappear out the apartment and downstairs, leaving Natsu to mull over his thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UGH. SO HOW WAS THAT. I swear this fic's updates make me nervous because I keep worrying about the pacing. I needed to emphasize on their frames of mind before I push the plot further so that the things they do make sense. I hope you bear with me. I know it's slow, and next chapter will definitely be pivotal. I don't know if you guys will like what I have in mind (nothing tragic or downer-ending, I assure you) but I hope it starts making sense once you understand a bit more of what is going on.
> 
> Also there's usually a lot going on in my head when I write fics, so it's possible there are some loopholes. Don't hesitate to point em out! Also ask questions that you're curious about and feel free to speculate... It helps me think further in terms of plot in case I'm making some majorly bad decisions. 
> 
> I promise the other characters, including Yukino, will be here soon!


	4. Head On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay the last chapter… Um. I want to address a couple of reviews/comments/feedback (from FF.Net) before I get on with this chapter. Putting this on here in case there needs to be clarification here as well. Sorry, I know you guys aren't here for this kind of stuff and for the story, but I felt it was important that I made myself clear. Just at least read the italicized parts, please?

**Responses to some reviews:**

**DoomMarine55****:** **Ao tired of you annoying Lucy fans b*** and m*** about Natsu leaving for a year, HE SAW HIS FATHER GET RIPPER APART IN FRONT OF HIM. Get over it. When's Lucy's d*** father died Natsu gave her space and she didn't even like him i'm so tired of you unsympathetic a*** acting like Lucy is the center of the universe and Natsu has no right to grieve especially when she didn't lose anything during Tartarus except the abikity to summon her b*** mermaid spirit.**  
  
**Garbage story, 0/10.**

_**Ans: **I don’t know, maybe I didn’t make it clear in my writing, but…. I absolutely do not at all think that Natsu leaving was awful. I thought that Lucy’s debate with herself said as much. Apparently I wasn’t clear enough, so, sorry about that. I am in no way saying that Natsu did not have the right to leave. My whole point of this fic has been how Lucy perceived his departure; it wasn’t even about the departure, it was about not being given a proper goodbye. Imo, it wouldn’t have hit as hard if the guild hadn’t disbanded as well, and hence the reaction from her. Maybe it was an overreaction, but fact is she had faced loss as well, and for someone with such abandonment issues, being told in a note that their closest friend was leaving without any proper explanation is bound to leave an impact. That’s how I perceived it. Once agian, no I don’t think Natsu did a wrong thing; but could he have done more than leave a vague note? Possibly. Is that great potential for angst? YES. That’s all I’m saying. It’s easy to forget that Lucy’s faced a loss too; so too much happened at once for her and hence her reaction._

**Guest: want Lucy to end whatever she has with Sting. It annoys me a lot. I understand that she's mad at Natsu for leaving her, I agree with her. But I can't stand to see her with another guy than Natsu. And she also got bad habits like drinking. It hides her inner turmoil and pain, it's obvious.**  
**I hope to see NaLu really soon !**

_**Ans: **I’m sorry it annoys you :( But people cope differently with different things. As I said before, the element with Sting is somewhat necessary to give Natsu a push. And do not mistake or worry about Lucy’s nightout as a “drinking problem”. It isn’t a “habit”. She isn’t an alcoholic or anything. That’s how she’s dealing with an exceptionally bad night is all; she resorted to it before but had decided to stop, but she got overwhelmed and resorted to it again, is all. And obviously, NaLu is endgame, so don’t you worry about that. Soon. Ish. **I repeat, Lucy is not an alcoholic.**_

* * *

**_Chapter 4 - Head On_**

* * *

Natsu crosses his arms as he leans against the counter, a small frown on his face. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting when he returned, but it was definitely not this. He can sense that Lucy has changed so much, the constant apprehension and wariness on her face is so uncharacteristic of her. This last year had started out just grieving Igneel, and even to this day, the image of Acnologia ripping Igneel apart haunted him. He had initially grieved the lost time and missed conversations with his father. He had channeled all of it into increasing his power and trained harder than ever before, because he would get Aconologia. He was determined to tear him into shreds if it was the last thing he did.

But over time it got better. It hurt less to think about. 

As the year passed, he’d lay under the stars, Happy curled into a ball on his chest, and he’d find himself wondering what Lucy was doing. He’d thought of coming home, but once his grief started to turn into acceptance he knew that he had to get stronger. If only to protect his friends and the people he loved. And he so he trained, but after that one time he crossed paths with Gildarts, something had changed.

Gildarts had asked about Lucy, but despite Natsu’s grumbled vague response, he knew in his mind that he was in love with his best friend. The realization didn’t really shock him; it was something he’d just avoided thinking about, but the thought… the thought had been there and he didn’t know when it creeped into his mind, but it had been there. Being asked about it so directly had given him the feeling of waking up. The possibility of Lucy loving him had thrilled him; something told him she did. Maybe it was the way she'd watch him sometimes, or the redness of her cheeks when he got too close (accidentally on purpose). And suddenly, he was waiting for the year to come to an end so he could go back to her.

And this… this was not what he was expecting to come to. Nothing like the fantasies he'd spun in his head of how it would go.

He was going to come home, surprise Lucy at hers, in fact, in Magnolia. He was going to sneak in through her window as usual and surprise her; in his mind's eye, she would be sleeping and if he was feeling bold enough, he'd kiss her awake. Or he would sit at the foot of the bed and wait for her wake up. He was fully prepared for the scolding he knew she would give him, and he already had an apology speech in his head. He planned on annoying her into forgiving him, and when she finally calmed down, she would ask him about his year, obviously. And then… then, he would tell her. 

He never would have left if he’d known Fairy Tail was going to disband. Actually, he would have, but he would definitely have taken Lucy with him. He would have, if he’d just known. He had been counting on them to be there for her, and he didn’t really have to guess how much it would’ve devastated her. The way she saw it, she had been left alone by people she considered family. He knows her. He knows that was exactly how she thought. He could see it in the wary way she spoke to him, and in her words last night when she'd asked him not to leave again.

The thought makes his heart ache a little, and for the umpteenth time that year, he wishes he’d just taken Lucy with him. That uneasiness he’d been feeling throughout whenever he thought about her apparently wasn’t without reason. He had dismissed it as him just missing her, but turns out something was actually wrong. 

But now, he feels lost and all over the place. He wants to make it better, he doesn’t want to see the sadness in her eyes, but he didn’t know how to make it go away.

* * *

Once Sting knew that they were out of Natsu’s earshot, he stops abruptly and turns to Lucy, arms crossed and she looks at him questioningly. 

“What was that about?” he asks her, an eyebrow quirked.

“What… was what about?” she mutters, pursing her lips. 

“_ You know _what,” he says accusingly, glaring at her.

Lucy sighs. “I don’t know… I don’t know why I don’t want him to know. It makes me feel guilty.”

Sting’s gaze softened. “Why?”

“I don’t know, Sting,” she says exasperatedly. “I just do.”

“He’s bound to find out eventually,” says Sting, pausing before adding. “Look, whatever makes you feel better. But I don’t think there’s any reason for you to feel guilty.”

Lucy sighs. “Yeah. He made his choice when he left and… I get why he had to. I just wish…”

Once again, Lucy knows, genuinely, why he had to leave. It isn’t easy watching a parent die. And especially in Natsu’s case, he’d just found his father after years of searching for him. It was bound to have devastated him. But coming home to that note… It had scared her first. _ Was he okay? _

And then she’d found herself worrying the rest of the night, only to be told the next morning that Fairy Tail was disbanding. She’d felt so lost the next few days, lost in a haze of heartbreak, worry and anger. It didn’t help that her efforts to reach out to Levy, Gray and Erza over the next few weeks had fallen flat. Even Cana. She didn’t bother reaching out to anyone else after; if she couldn’t reach out to the closest of her friends… There was no hope. And they’d all suffered losses, so while she didn’t really hate them or blame them in anyway, it had left her in a dark place; loneliness always did. 

Days went by and though she’d tried not to be bitter, she couldn’t help wondering how he cared enough only to just leave behind a vague note. How could he have possibly thought that that would’ve been enough? The line of thought had led her down a spiral as she worried that maybe,_ just maybe _, she’d looked too much into their relationship. 

Maybe it had meant nothing afterall. 

The realization had been crushing, and she’d never felt more alone. If she hadn’t met Yukino and Sting at the bar eight months ago, there was no telling as to where she would have been right now if she hadn’t found a new sense of purpose. 

Sting can almost hear her thoughts running wild and he pulls Lucy into a hug. “Natsu-san can be an idiot, from what I’ve heard. But I’m sure he had good intentions…”

Lucy pulls back, laughing through a sniffle. “Of course, he did. It’s Natsu.”

And with that, it’s settled. All said and done, he was back. He is still her bestfriend, and she wants to be there for him. She wants to do her best to move on from the past just like everyone else had. The hollowness won’t go away so easily, but it will eventually. She had wanted to see him for so long now, so why push him away when he was finally back?

“You think Natsu-san would join Sabretooth?” asks Sting thoughtfully. 

“Probably not,” mutters Lucy. “I don’t know what he intends to do. Maybe he’ll leave again.”

Sting looks at Lucy’s worried face and places a comforting hand on her shoulder. “Honestly? I doubt it.”

Lucy grunts but doesn’t contest him. She didn’t want to dwell on that anymore; she didn’t want to think about it either. It would make it impossible for her not to dwell on it. As she walks with Sting to get the tickets, she tells herself that Natsu wouldn’t leave like that again. 

* * *

The ride back to Zinnia City is pretty quiet. Because the dragon slayers were passed out on their own train seats, trying to cope with their motion sickness. Lucy is sitting with Happy in her lap. Opposite her are Minerva, who was holding a sleeping Frosch and Yukino, who was petting Lector as she watched Lucy carefully, occasionally exchanging worried glances with Minerva.

Finally, Minerva sighs, making Lucy look at her questioningly. 

“How are you?” she asks, resting her hand on the handle of the seat, using it hold her face.

“Fine,” says Lucy, making Yukino look at her indignantly. 

“No, you’re not, Lucy. I… You can talk to us, you know?” says Yukino softly, earning a single nod from Minerva.

Lucy can’t help a small smile as she looks at her friends. They’d both welcomed her with open arms when she’d joined the guild eight months ago. It had taken her a while to warm up to Minerva, but she’d been surprisingly persistent. Yukino and Lucy had become partners and often went on missions together to strengthen their celestial magic. Minerva and Lucy had begun to bond over their love for cooking (truth be told, Minerva was more of an eater). There were rare days when they’d have a girls night and go shopping together and even stay up late just talking about all kinds of things. Rare, because Lucy rarely felt in the mood for light hearted days; most days, she just spent working on jobs and trying to get more attuned to her powers. But there were good days; days she’d cherish and days because of which she knows Yukino and Minerva would always be her friends. 

Well, as always as it could get she supposed. 

“I wasn’t fine,” says Lucy softly, her voice low. “It made me so angry that he just showed up as if he’d never left, but… to be fair… he didn’t know. I can’t really blame him for…”

“Actually,” interrupts Minerva with emphasis, and Lucy braces herself for a harsh opinion that she knows would follow. “Feelings or no feelings, you don’t leave a friend hanging like that with a stupid note. It was a dick move.”

“I agree with her,” nods Yukino.

Lucy bites her lip, frowning. “He’d seen his father die… I… don’t think he was thinking straight. He didn’t mean to hurt me.”

“He’s still a dumbass,” mutters Minerva, eyeing Natsu, a couple of seats behind them, who was now busy sticking his head out of the window as he inhaled lungfuls of air. 

“_ Minerva _!” exclaims Lucy, eyes darting to Natsu nervous that he might have heard something. 

Minerva glares at Lucy. “I cannot believe you’re defending him!” she says, crossing her arms and glares harder at Lucy. “Maybe you’ve forgotten, but I remember how you were back then. Like a lost little sheep, either crying yourself to sleep or drinking away to glory!”

“I haven’t forgotten,” snaps Lucy. How could she forget. At times, she thought she’d only gotten better at hiding who she was back then, that she hadn’t really gotten better. “It’s… I’m still somewhat upset, okay? But… I get why he did it.” Pause. “I think.” Pause. “It’s all muddled in here,” she says, tapping her head, annoyed. “I don’t even want to think about it anymore. It’s easier to leave the thinking at the idea that he needed the time. People have their own ways…”

“True,” interjects Yukino. “It’s not like Sting was doing better,” she says with a grimace. “He practically drank himself to death the first couple of weeks.”

“Ha, maybe the smell of the alcohol drove you two to each other,” Minerva says to Lucy with a snort.

Lucy huffs. “Well, we did meet at a bar.”

Minerva snickers, making Lucy shake her head. “It’s good in a way,” shrugs Lucy. “I never would have joined Sabretooth otherwise.”

Minerva hums thoughtfully, and Yukino hesitates for a second before asking Lucy, “Did you er, tell him about it?”

Lucy tenses. ‘It’ could be a lot of things. “About what?”

Yukino gestures towards Lucy’s necklace, and Lucy’s hand automatically goes to touch the gold chain. She pulls it out absent-mindedly, staring at the pendant of the necklace now glinting in her hand; Aquarius’s golden gate key. Or whatever was left of it. 

“No,” mutters Lucy, her hand closing around the broken key. “It never came up,” she says, slipping the necklace back inside her shirt. 

“It won’t,” says Minerva. “Because _ he doesn’t know _.”

Lucy makes a face but says nothing, and then Minerva asks again, “What about the _ other _ thing?”

She huffs again. “_ What other thing _?”

Both Minerva and Yukino respond at the same time.

“About Sting.”

“About how you feel.”

Lucy hushes them both, before looking at Natsu again, who was now leaning his head weakly against the glass pane of the train. She feels the urge to have him lie down in her lap, just like she used to before, but it feels weird this time. She knows Natsu had thought that was what would happen, because she’d seen his face fall slightly when Happy had settled down in her lap excitedly. Pouting at her when she shrugged with a weak smile, he took another seat.

“Wow,” mutters Minerva, snapping Lucy out of her thoughts, and she blinks with confusion as she shifts her gaze back to Minerva, who was smirking now and Yukino was trying to hold back a smile. “That dragon slayer still has you _ whipped _whipped.”

“Shut up,” says Lucy, feeling her cheeks flush, but in her mind, she starts to worry again. This wasn’t supposed to happen. She wasn’t supposed to be “_ whipped _ whipped”. She was supposed to have gotten over this. _ Ugh. _She bites the inside of her cheek with worry, because this wasn’t good. He was back. Her best friend was back and she couldn’t afford to let her feelings possibly drive him away again.

Pause. 

_ Feelings? What feelings? I am sooo over them. It's been a whole **year.** _

She tells herself. She is half tempted to grab Sting and ask him to take her in the bathroom of the train just so she could feel just a little bit more in control of herself. And the guilt is back. She hates feeling like she was using her friend, which she would be if she called on him whenever she felt herself spiralling. She knew deep down that the very basis of whatever was going on between Sting and her was a way of escapism for both of them, but in this moment, she couldn’t help but focusing on how she felt about this.

_ Gah. _

_ Why is this so hard, _she laments, considering for a moment just running away far away, away from this situation, away from her friends and away from Natsu for a moment of clarity. The train billowing as it pulls into Zinnia City station pulls her back into reality. Not a very place.

Running away would be just escaping things even more; going away from here wouldn’t help her. She had to tackle this head on. As head on as she could, at least.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh this was longer than I expected so I split it into two chapters. Fine tuning the next one so hopefully it won't take too long to publish. I think this fic's gonna work out to be longer than 8 chapters lol. And once again, I'm really really sorry if the pace is irritating you :( As I said before, I need to set up their headspace before moving forward. GAHHH please be patient. :( I really need y'all to tell me, okay? So I know what works and doesn't. IDK WHY THIS FIC MAKES ME NERVOUS TO PUBLISH EVERY TIME.


	5. Incoherence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, I love you guys. Thank you for being so supportive and nice to me :') It means so, so much to me. 
> 
> Second of all, be warned, this chapter might just be a bit exhausting to read. I really hope you guys like this one. As per usual, I’m nervous… I don’t know what it is about this fic... maybe because something tells me you didn’t think it would go this way, but I hope you guys like it anyway.

* * *

** _Chapter 5 - Incoherence_ **

* * *

Natsu really hates trains. With a passion. Any moving vehicle, in fact. He’s sitting queasily, hands clutching his stomach as he tries to tune out the voices around him. It was hard to just turn his hearing off, obviously, but he really needs to focus on his very upset stomach right now. But as he hears a mix of strange voices...

“How are you?” Minerva.

“Fine.” An obvious lie. 

He looks up to see only the top of her blonde head leaning against the glass window. He can just make out Yukino sitting opposite her as well. Minerva, sitting next to Yukino, was clearer in his view; she was looking skeptically at Lucy. He feels a powerful lurch in his stomach as he jumps to stick his head out of the window, cursing as he strains his hearing to concentrate. Natsu wasn’t the eavesdropping kind, he really wasn’t. But something was going on and if no one would tell him, he might as well make use of his abilities.

“...still a dumbass.” 

“Minerva!” Natsu wonders if he had imagined Lucy’s gaze briefly flicker to him over her shoulder. 

An angry exclamation that he couldn’t make out just as he felt another wave of nausea. “I remember how you were back then. Like a lost little sheep, either crying yourself to sleep or drinking away to glory!”

_ Oh. _ He didn’t have to think too hard to understand what “back then” meant. The thought made his chest ache with unease. The realization that _ that _ was when she started drinking makes him angry as he starts to fret over why he hadn’t just taken her with him. Happy had suggested as much, but he had refused. It was embarrassing now that he’d thought that way back then, but he didn’t want her to see him so weak and defeated; not to mention, he had definitely needed space. He wasn’t sure if Lucy’s words of comfort would’ve helped if he hadn’t had at least some time to process… _ things… _ by himself. Simply put, he needed space and he was also afraid of hurting her. _ Idiot. _

“It’s all muddled in here… People have their own ways…”

“Not like Sting was doing better...drank himself to death the first couple of weeks…”

“Ha, maybe the smell of the alcohol drove you two to each other...” Sarcasm. 

_ Drove them to each other? _ What did _that_ mean? He knew… _ maybe. _But it couldn’t be. It was too… weird. It would be another interference in a list of long interferences with his original plan.

“...never would have joined Sabretooth otherwise.”

“Did you er, tell him about it?”

_ Him? Who? _

Increase in heart rate. “About what?”

“No.” Soft and sad. “It never came up.” 

“It won’t,” Minerva, annoyed. Again. “Because _ he doesn’t know _ .” _ Exactly. Someone gets it. _

“...the _ other _ thing?” _ How many things are there? _ ** _!_ **

“_ What other thing _?” Annoyed Lucy.

“About Sting.” “About how you feel.” 

He feels sick again as he leans his head against the window, and he isn’t sure if it’s because of the train this time. 

* * *

The dragon slayers are the first to hop out of the train when it pulled into Zinnia City, and luckily, in a surprising break of tradition, didn’t get left behind on the train. After some squabbling about whether to walk or to take a vehicle to the guild, they finally decide on walking, because three whiny dragon slayers were insufferable enough. The group - Lucy, Natsu, Sting, Rogue, Minerva, Yukino, Rufus and Nangear - started a slow walk towards the guild, Lucy, Natsu and Sting lagging behind the group as Lucy pointed out places of interest in the city to Natsu. 

She was getting increasingly agitated because Natsu was quieter than usual and it was freaking her out. No snide comments, no _ dumbass _comments or even mild curiosity about anything; just an almost invisible frown on his face as he walked between her and Sting, arms crossed as he quietly followed her gestures and nodded. It made her very nervous and in her nervousness, she was babbling, earning amused looks from Sting.

Natsu, with his feet now on solid ground and thoughts more coherent, has been mulling over the tidbits he’d heard in the train. It feels like some things have clicked into place as he replays the bits he’d heard on the train. Things like how Lucy was oddly upbeat since she’d returned from purchasing train tickets that morning with Sting. The knowing glances Sting kept throwing her way as well as the sense of familiarity the two seemed to have. Sting changing Lucy into her pajamas with absolutely no resistance from Lucy; she would’ve Lucy-kicked Natsu. The fact that it was perfectly normal that Sting had put her in his t-shirt. _ The fact that his t-shirt was in her drawer in the first place. _

Was it possible for his insides to cringe? Why did this hurt so much? 

That’s a dumb questions, he knows exactly why it hurt.

_ I love her, and I’m too late. _

His glance shot up at her as she pointed to a small cafe, telling him quickly about how they had the best coffee in Zinnia City and how she’d come here almost everyday the first couple of weeks she’d joined Sabretooth. And how the chef at the cafe loves her and gives her a free slice of caramel cake ever since she’d saved his cat, but how that was only thanks to Aries. 

“...if it wasn’t for her wool, the cat wouldn’t have made it,” she says, chuckling nervously. “Now that I think about it, I haven’t visited the cafe in a while. Right, Sting? We should go again some time. You too, Natsu we should all go and…”

_ What? _

Natsu frowns and looks at her, wondering what the hell she was talking about before realizing that she was babbling. _ She’s nervous. _His gaze flickers around the area, wondering what in the world was making her so nervous, but comes up with nothing. He looks at Sting, who looks like he’s trying not to laugh, and he feels a familiar pang of jealousy at the idea that Sting knew something he didn’t. 

“And this is the bar where I met Sting and the gang before joining Sabretooth…”

“We did a lot more than meet at this bar,” chortles Sting, and Lucy glares daggers at him before he shrugs casually adding with a roll of his eyes. “We had multiple hangovers here.”

Natsu sighs internally. He knew that wasn’t it, but he also was in no mood to argue about it to call them out. He didn’t think he ever would be; he feels he'd be better off not knowing . 

“Wait,” says Natsu frowning as he realizes something else. “What were you doing in Zinnia City?”

And suddenly she looks nervous again, her hand going up to play with the gold necklace around her neck. “After the guild disbanded... I travelled for a bit… Just looking for something to do. Jobs, or… whatever. Bars and pubs are a good place to start,” she says, looking sheepish. "People always came in and they... well, talked and I could find jobs to do. Small ones, but it was enough..."

“I see.” 

He sees the faraway look in her eyes and he finds it hard to picture Lucy, fussy, somewhat spoilt Lucy, hopping into musty bars looking for jobs. Musty bars filled with lecherous men. His thoughts darken just a little, and he feels like he still hasn't fully comprehended what she had gone through; like a piece was missing. Why hadn't anyone kept in touch? _Where _were they now? Had everyone really just… left like that? She went around alone? Another sigh.

“Natsu? Are you okay?” asks Lucy suddenly, noting his crestfallen face with concern. 

“Just tired,” he mutters. 

“A couple more minutes and we’ll be at the guild, Natsu-san,” says Sting, stifling a yawn as he admits that he was tired as well.

“I need to find an inn first,” groans Natsu, running a hand down his face, earning a surprised look from Lucy. 

“What? Why would you find an inn? You’ll be staying with me,” she says confused, almost as if that should be obvious. “My place is pretty close to the guild…”

“Staying with you?” asks Natsu, and he isn’t sure why he’s surprised, but he is. He looks over Sting to gauge his reaction, but he looks as confused as Lucy. “You’re… okay with that?”

Lucy looks at him strangely. “Of course, Natsu! Why… wouldn’t I be? I don’t understand. Why are you-”

He cuts her off with what he hopes is a genuine chuckle. “Oh, I don’t know what I was thinking, must be my nausea addled brain, Luce!”

She stares at him but concedes, her concerned expression still not leaving her face, prompting Natsu to punch her playfully in the arm. “Aw, come on, Luce, I’m just tired. There’s no need to worry.”

“If you say so,” she says quietly before adding, “We’re here!”

She hands the key to Natsu, telling him where her apartment is before saying that she needed a word with Sting, who looks indignantly at her. Natsu takes the key, waving a goodbye, and wonders why Lucy was tiptoeing around this whole thing with Sting. Why wouldn’t she just tell him about Sting? Why the secrecy?

* * *

When he enters her apartment, he smells it. The White Dragon Slayer. It’s everywhere. He wonders if that had been the case in Crocus as well and if he had just missed it because he didn’t think much of it then. The thought is agitating. He sets down his stuff and takes a seat on the couch, eyes taking in her new apartment. It was decorated differently, but it was more or less the same stuff from her old apartment. Just as he caught sight of a painting of the guild over the mantle, the door clicked open Lucy walked in.

Lucy had given Sting a piece of her mind. The clown really had zero perception and while normally she’d find his teasing amusing, what part of the timing didn’t he understand? Maybe being dense is another dragon slayer quality, she muses.

He sees she has an amused smile on her face as she asks him if he was hungry as she makes her way into the kitchen. He nods, as he follows her and before his brain can catch up to his mouth, the words are out.

“Sting come home a lot?” he asks tightly, trying to sound as casual as possible, as he settles himself on the stool by the kitchen island. 

  
She freezes, licking her lip nervously as she places a strip of bacon in the pan she’d just placed on the stove. She gives it a half-hearted poke, then another, trying to find the words to explain as she turns away from him to hide the rage of conflicting emotions on her face. 

“Yeah,” she replies. Pause. “He does.”

_ Oh. _ Natsu rolls over the words in his head to form a question he _ needs _an answer to. It has to be a carefully constructed question and it could potentially be a delicate subjects. He hates having to ask this. He’s scared of the answer, but he had to know. It would eat him away otherwise. And so, he very carefully asks, with bated breath, “So how long have you and Sting been seeing each other?”

He didn't mean for it to come out as sharply as it did. He had intended the question to sound almost teasing, the way one friend asks another, genuine but with playful curiosity; that was the tone he was going for, but it didn’t sound like that in the remotest sense. Her hands drop to her side as she stares at him, her entire body tenses. A couple of seconds, and she turns on her heel to turn her back to him, staring at the pan with bacon in it again.

Did he know? _ What _ did he? How did he know? How was she supposed to explain? 

It flustered her that he would even ask her in the first place. He never cared about this kind of stuff, least of all enough to actually ask about it.

_ There’s no reason to be nervous. Or even guilty for that matter. _

_ There’s no reason to feel guilty. I know that. Then why... do I want to make sure he understands that it's... platonic... _

There’s a lull in her thoughts as she comes to a realization. 

She didn’t want him to know because deep down she still held hope. There was still a sense of ambiguity about the whole thing, but telling him about Sting would make everything so… definitive about where they stood. She wanted to make sure he understood that there wasn't anything romantic because that would give a seemingly definitive answer as to where she stood in _case _he returned her feelings. 

_ That's stupid. He has no feelings. He wouldn't have left like that... _

But telling Natsu feels like it would just change something and very clearly draw a line that she still held out hope wasn’t there. She feels tears welling up in her eyes, a mix of anger and sadness as she tries to talk herself down. It doesn’t work. She is struggling with the words in her head and she feels breathless. A twisted part of her thinks none of this would be happening if Natsu hadn’t come back, but she’s so happy to see him… 

_ Fuck. _

Natsu doesn’t say anything, only watches her tense back as she pokes and prods at whatever she’s making. He doesn’t understand why she’s being secretive about it with him. There was no reason to hide it from him… No reason that _ she _knew of, at least. Unless…? He watches her warily.

_ Ugh. _

Lucy had to stomp on her feelings again, real hard so they stayed underneath the goddamn foot she used to stomp on them. Why in god’s name was it so difficult to admit something like this to someone? Especially if said someone didn’t really reciprocate her feelings? Maybe she should just be honest with him. There was no point in hiding it now anyway, was there? Inhaling deeply, she adds spices over the bacon with a flourish before turning around to face Natsu, one hand on the black granite of the kitchen top and the other on her hip as she leans in towards the stone top. 

Her silence is answer enough for him though (or so he thinks), but he needs to her say it.

“Luce?”

“We’re… not… dating…” she says slowly, her brain going into drive as she struggles to explain the situation, and the way Natsu is cynically staring at her, as if he didn’t believe, makes her all the more nervous. 

“Why are you lying to me?” he asks, his voice just a little higher, frustration starting to seep through his words.

_ What? _

“I’m... not lying,” she says carefully. “I’m not... _dating_, Sting.” _We're... Hooking up? Screwing? Having meaningless sex?_

Natsu rolls his eyes this time, because please, just rip the band aid off already. He doesn't even know why he needs this conversation to happen, but he does. He had to _know_. “Sure, you aren’t. I heard you on the train…”

He hears her heart rate pick up. _ Aha! _But that he’d caught her in a lie, didn’t really feel as victorious as it would have. He’d been hoping so badly that he was wrong this time. 

“Wh-What did you hear?” She feels like her heart would jump out of her chest, and she feels an odd sort of numbness around her cheeks. When she watches his face, she comes to the realization that he could probably hear her heart racing. 

“I… Not all of it, just bits... About you and Sting,” he mutters. “Feelings and… stuff.”

Lucy stares at him, and it takes her brain a moment to catch up. She wants to laugh. She really does, because _ of all the things _ he could’ve possibly heard in that conversation… _ This _is what he gets? She also wants to cry. There was now, clearly an elephant in the room she doesn’t want to address. Maybe it would be easier to just tell him that she was, in fact, seeing Sting. It wouldn’t be that hard to pretend anyway; the thought makes her snort to herself. But she couldn’t possibly pull that charade forever. Unless he left again; which he just might if she told him the truth… 

Lucy doesn’t notice, lost amidst the trainwreck of her thoughts, that her hand had gone automatically to the necklace, tugging at it absent-mindedly till she felt the cold jaggedness of the pendant against her palm. This, throughout the pain, had been her most comforting thing through last year. Initially it had only brought pain, served as a reminder of everything she’d lost, but she’d felt it pulse warmly in her hand once. Maybe it had been her imagination, but ever since then, she found the feeling of the broken key in her hand comforting. 

As she worries her lower lip, Natsu’s irritation fades into the background for a bit when he sees the golden necklace. How had he not noticed it until now? She never used to wear a necklace like that one before. And… he watches as she clenches and unclenches her hand around the pendant nervously. There’s a flicker of recognition in his brain at its familiar shape and before long, he’s covered the space between them to curl his hand around hers.

She looks up, startled, and her gaze travels down to see his hand curled around hers, which was curled around the broken golden key. Her throat goes dry when he uses his other hand to pry open her now tightly clenched wrist. 

He stares at the broken key in her hand. It had left dark pink indents where it had pressed against her now clammy hand. 

“Lucy… What is this?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG. This one was kind of hard to write. I titled the chapter ‘Incoherence’ for a very specific reason. I hope it didn’t bother you guys how unstructured and all over the place this one was; I did that on purpose as a way to emphasize on the confusing clash in their minds. 
> 
> ALSO. please be patient, we’re almost at the end… The Moment, is coming very, very soon. I just thought some things needed to be cleared first.
> 
> I initially thought of Natsu confronting her harsher than this. Sort of angry + jealous like, “so how long have you and sting been screwing each other”. This was supposed to come at a later point after a couple of instances of built up anger and jealousy, but that felt so unlike him; definitely makes for a great angsty scene, but Natsu would never say that; at least not in the way I’d written him in this fic. I think while being heartbroken, he’d just be upset that she was lying to him.
> 
> And just btw, I, a clown, have lived this. Except for the fuck buddies part. I've lived the "feelings" angle of it, so I've basically projected my own dumbass brain's reaction on here.


	6. Broken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ANOTHER UPDATE? THIS SOON? turns out hateful reviews fire me up and make me wanna write more :P two more chapters to go!
> 
> Once again... I fail to understand why people would read something they hate with the pure purpose of shitting on it... Like, what is the reason? How do you have that much time? 
> 
> On the bright side, the hateful reviews (only on FF.net. Seems like everyone on AO3 is pretty decent) kind of do increase my review count, I suppose. Either ways, I can't be one to shut up and not respond to people, so I'm going to respond though I know it's best not to feed the hate. 
> 
> If you don't wanna read that, it's completely a-okay and feel free to skip straight to the story!! Let me know how you like it and I want to thank the rest of you - Chess_Blackfyre, Kaityy, TechnoSkittles, vee - for your continuous support and I can't tell you how much your kind words meant to me.

**Responses to some reviews:**

**N (Guest):** ** Don't make it NaLu . Lucy wasn't the only one suffering. Natsu was the one who suffered the most . Shouldn't Lucy had remained loyal towards natsu too.**

_ This again… Okay, I’d like to start with saying suffering isn’t a quantifiable feeling. Both of them suffered. Natsu saw his father die so he needed to leave. And why do so many people seem to think that Lucy lost/suffered nothing? Lucy silently saved the entire guild at the cost of the closest thing she’d had to a mother-like companion, someone she viewed as the last link she had with her mother, only for her best friend whom she was secretly in love with to leave with nothing more than a note, and everyone she considered a family just up and leaving. And no, it doesn’t take away from the fact that Natsu had the right to leave as did the rest of the guild members. Human emotions aren’t black and white. She’s allowed to feel hurt at the way they cut off and the way Natsu left with nothing but a note as a goodbye; she’d been dealing with feeling abandoned her whole life, so of course this would affect her. And “this” isn’t just Natsu leaving, it’s a lot deeper than that. _

_ And secondly…. No, there was nothing for Lucy to stay “loyal” to. Yes, if he had confessed his feelings, but he didn’t; his departure made her think there were no feelings in the first place, so why would she stay ‘loyal’ to someone that she thought didn’t love her the same way? Loyalty is in no way involved here. She wasn’t cheating on him or anything. _

_ In this situation, no one owes anyone anything. Everyone did what they did for their own reasons. There’s no right or wrong here; sometimes things just are the way they are with no one to blame, but people react any way to it. _

**guest:** ** this is the angsty-est f*** faggiest s*** i've ever read. you're garbage lel**

_ Shame that you don’t like angst. Literally no one is forcing you to read it. Just hit the close button if you hate it so much. If anything you’re the garbage hear spewing hate + using the f slur :P Anyways, this stands for everyone. If you don’t like a fic - not just mine - don’t read it to just be a dickhead in the comments. It doesn’t take much. I have tried being polite about this, but I can’t anymore because it’s so simple to just NOT read what you don’t like. _

**DoomMarine55:** _They had something "pleasant" to say again but instead of getting into that because I already reponded in an admittedly mean ass way in the DMs, I just wanted to out them as a NaLu shipper because I checked their profile and I found some real good NaLu fic in their favourites for someone who kept trashing me and called me "selfish" for shipping NaLu who are apparently like brother-sister. I'm just really confused + amused by this discovery._

**Michiamotippete:** ** I loved this. I wished the part of ***buddies would be portrayed longer but I like this way too. AH I KNEW IT HE HEARD SOMETHING! And I was thinking he'd confront Sting lol that would be cool. Finally the time has come, I hope, LUCY NEEDS TO TELL HIM EVERYTHING!**

_ Honestly same. The whole fic came about at first because I wanted a jealous Natsu and an oblivious Lucy because ‘why would he even care’. In fact, the way this fic first came to my head was borderline absurd; Natsu stumbles upon Sting asleep in Lucy’s bed, but that would have made it kind of intimate and somewhat romantic, and that would mean I’d’ve have to hurt bb Sting. But I am, not gonna lie, kind of playing with the idea of “spin off” OS or short multi chapter or something where the FWB part lasts a little longer and there’s overall more angst sjkdjksld. AND YAYY ILY AND THANK YOU FOR REVIEWING A NICE THING, I REALLY APPRECIATE IT. _

* * *

_ **Chapter 6 - Broken** _

* * *

He stares at the broken key in her hand. It had left dark pink indents where it had pressed against her now clammy hand. 

“Lucy… What is this?”

Her first instinct is to draw back immediately, the broken key now resting against her chest as it fell out of her palm. But she doesn’t get very far because Natsu tightens his grip on her wrist and pulls her closer before using his other hand to pick the key back up. He brings it to his face, examining it for a couple more seconds before he finally puts a name to it. He recognises the blue symbol on it, the two simple waves. 

_ Aquarius. _

He doesn’t understand. Was it broken? Was it _ the _key or was it just a copy of some? It can’t be the original… He looks at Lucy, questioningly, clearly troubled, but she looks away, inhaling deeply.

“Luce…” he says, but it’s more of a question. 

She squirms a bit in his grip and he lets her go. She wraps her arms protectively around herself and when her eyes fill up with tears, he starts to panic. He takes another step towards her before his hand curls around hers and he pulls her towards the living room. She follows, almost reluctantly, as he sits her down on the couch and he sits next to her, watching as she collects herself.

“It’s Aquarius’s key…” she sniffles. “I… broke it.”

Natsu looks at her with shock. “You _ broke _ it?! _ Why _?” he asks alarmed. 

“I had no choice,” she says, wiping tears off her face. She puts her feet up on the couch, pulling her legs closer to her body as she rests her chin in the valley formed by her knees. “Everyone was dying…”

Natsu frowns, still not catching. “Luce… what happened? _ Who _was dying? When did this happen?”

She looks at him, her brown eyes swirling with sadness and hesitation. He can practically hear her internal debate and he sighs, touching her hand gently. “Luce, _ talk _to me.”

“It happened before you left,” she says quietly, and he stiffens, a look of disbelief etched on his face.

“What? I would’ve known if-”

“No one knows,” she says, leaning sideways so her cheeks were pressed against the back of the couch, hands still clutching her legs to her body as she watches him. “Everyone was… trapped… in Alegria.”

Natsu remembers Alegria. He remembers the breathlessness that had surrounded and the sense of suffocation. He remembers breaking through it in the end, surfacing as he tore through the muscly abomination. His heart had nearly hammered out of his chest as he’d made it just in time to swallow the fire that Tempester had thrown towards a collapsed Lucy, as the rest of Demons had converged on her. And he now recollects his realization that Lucy had probably done something to save them… he’d never asked how…

“No…” he says out loud, his eyes darting to look at the broken key suspending from the necklace around her neck. “_ No _,” he says, his voice rising as he recalls how exhausted she’d been. How pale she’d looked, puffiness around her eyes and her tear-stained face as she’d said that she wanted to help, and how he’d said she needed to rest, because he could sense that her magic had drained completely.

“What did you do?” he asks, agitated and his throat is dry as he feels a heavy weight settle in his chest.

“I had to break it… To summon the Celestial Spirit King,” she says, taking in a ragged breath. “He was the only one who could dispel the curse and I was the only one who could… do something.”

“Why didn’t you say something…” he mutters, voice soft, scooting closer to her. 

She gives him a seemingly nonchalant shrug and when she looks away, he understands what she isn’t saying. _ You weren’t there. _He closes the gap between them as he hugs her tightly, her knees against his chest as she tenses. She starts to pull away, asking him something, but he holds her tighter, and she relaxes, her head tucked under his chest. 

“I’m sorry I left,” he says quietly against her neck. 

“What?” comes her muffled voice as she raises her head to look at him in confusion. 

“I’m sorry I left,” he repeats, looking away. “If I hadn’t left… You were all alone and-”

“Natsu, no,” she says, shaking her head vehemently. Lucy now has her hands on either sides of his face as she turns his head to force him to look at her. “You couldn’t have known. This wasn’t your fault. Sometimes, things just happen and… there’s nothing we can do about it.” Pause. “I’m not mad… that you left.” And it was the truth.

He understands her implications. “But… you _ are _mad…”

“Not… mad,” she says, knowing that her words were being clung to by the dragon slayer, absent-mindedly grazing her thumb across his cheek. She didn’t want him to think he shouldn’t have left; nor feel bad about it. He had needed space. As had everyone else. That had never been why she was upset at all. “I’m just hurt,” she says, finally.

He purses his lips as he watches, but doesn’t say anything, waiting for her to continue. She was… hurt… how was that supposed to make him feel better? She withdraws her hands to rub her forehead with one of them as she sighs deeply before looking at him.

“You didn’t even say goodbye,” she says, her voice shaky. “You left me… a _ note _ . And it was _ barely _ a note. I ran out of the apartment, tried to look for you. I’d hoped I’d at least find some sign of you at the guild the next day, but the guild... Well, you know what happened.” Hollow laugh. “And you just came back like nothing happened. I was so worried. I just… wanted to say goodbye. See you off, or _ something _. The note made me feel like I… Like I… meant nothing.”

Hushed silence. 

“That’s not true. You mean everything,” says Natsu. Pause. “You’re… my best friend.”

An almost sad, low chuckle. “I know, Natsu. It’s okay. I understand why you did it. You were devastated and angry. I was just being a bit selfish, I suppose and-”

“No,” Natsu cuts her off. “You’re right. I should’ve left with more than just a note. I just… couldn’t face you. I knew you would try and stop me. But I just had to…”

His hand absent-mindedly touches his bandaged arm, drawing Lucy’s gaze to it.

“...go away. It was the only way. To defeat E.N.D. To defeat Zeref.”

Her breath catches. “You… know how?”

“Yeah, I think so,” he mumbles, hand now fully resting against his bandaged arm. 

“Igneel’s flames,” is the only explanation he offers, and Lucy doesn’t pry any further as she takes in the sad look on his flames. 

“We’ll take them down,” she says, trying to smile.

“No doubt in my mind,” he replies, a half hearted grin on his face.

Things feel just a little lighter, aside from the now smaller elephant in the room, but neither wanted to push it. They sit in comfortable silence, and somehow they’re sitting closer now, leaning relaxedly into the back of the couch, shoulder-to-shoulder. 

“I’m glad you’re back,” she says, giving him a watery smile. 

“Yeah, I’m finally home,” he agrees, giving her the smallest of smiles as he looks at her.

* * *

Natsu is unable to fall asleep. He stares at the ceiling, thinking through the events of the day. The had exchanged stories of last year over dinner that evening, after their conversation. She’d talked about her modelling job, brief stint as a reporter at the Sorcerer’s Weekly before joining Sabretooth; she’d missed using magic. He talked about his year, the mountains he had ended up destroying and about his encounter with Gildarts; only part of it obviously. 

She’d talked about Minerva beating him at an eating competition, Yukino and her going together on jobs to strengthen their magic as well as get accustomed to the use of her newfound Star Dress power, Rogue’s solo job that Frosch got lost on, but not really because she just fell asleep in his backpack and many other things. 

He could tell she wanted to ask him to join Sabretooth, and he was glad she hadn’t. Despite everything, he’s still worried about his friends and where they were. He had really wanted to bring up the idea of trying to get Fairy Tail back together but decided against it when she mentioned again, sometime over their dinner, that she hadn’t been able to contact anyone despite her efforts. She had admitted that she’d tried after months, but it had been of no use. 

It just wasn’t like them...

Apart from this dark cloud, things had, for the most part, gotten better between them. They had played cards, Natsu triumphant and a disgruntled Lucy heading to bed. Everything was almost okay. 

Except Lucy hadn’t mentioned relationship with Sting even once.

He isn’t able to decide whether her lack of mentioning that relationship troubled him or relieved him. He really wishes he’d just asked her again instead of worrying like this. He _ had _to know, but he also didn’t want to.

_ Shut up, brain. _ _ _

Conflicting thoughts were tiring. He sits up and looks around the dark room. He paces the living room for a bit, and against his better instincts finds himself in Lucy’s bedroom. He hasn’t been in there yet. It looks similar to the one back in Magnolia. He sees her face the most peaceful he’s seen since he’d returned as she sleeps, curled onto one side, hand resting under cheek. He is tempted to slip into bed next to her, just like he used to, but a strange, unfamiliar sort of hesitation is holding him back. It somehow feels wrong to do it tonight. He sighs, and turns on his heels to walk out, when he freezes at the sight of the wall he’s now facing.

Pictures, clips of newspapers, small notes, threads and arrows making connections he couldn’t make sense of. She’d tried tracking them all, he realizes as he sees pictures of his guildmates as he gets closer. There’s a red question mark over his. _ Sigh. _Erza, Gray and Levy had the least notes, he observes as he studies what she’s written. 

“I gave up six months ago.”

He jumps at her voice, turning around, prepared to start apologising profusely when she chuckles lightly. 

“Looks like you still have the habit of breaking into my bedroom, huh?”

He looks at her sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck as he lets out a nervous chuckle. Sitting up straighter, she leans against the headboard. “Erza, Gray and Levy fell off the grid entirely. The others keep popping up from time to time, but I just… gave up. It didn’t look like anyone wanted to come back, so…” she shrugs.

“I see,” Natsu says, turning back around to look at the wall, arms crossed against his chest. 

“I know what you’re thinking…” she says, her voice soft. “I know it’s not like you to give up, but… I… think it’s over, Natsu.”

He sighs, bowing his head down as he stares at the floor. He doesn’t say anything to her, when he feels her arms hugging him from behind as she murmurs a soft apology. 

“You have nothing to apologize for,” he says, as he touches her arm that was now around his waist, lightly.

She nods against his back and then sneaks forward to face him. He looks at her somewhat sad, and when he sighs, she ends up cupping his face with her hand.

_ What am I doing?_ _ _

_ What am I doing?_ _ _

_ What am I doing?_ _ _

_ What am I doing?_ _ _

He’s looking at her with wide eyed as she searches his face. 

“You have nothing to apologize for either,” she says and when he starts to protest, she cuts him off. “All I wanted was a proper goodbye, Natsu, that’s all. But I’ll never hold it against you that you left. You needed to grieve. I… understand that.”

Natsu just nods once against her hand, and stares at her. There’s still sadness in her eyes. He is tempted to plant a kiss on her cheek but… _ Sting. _They hadn’t discussed it yet but he knows now that there are some boundaries he couldn’t cross. He would never admit this to Lucy, but more than not giving her a goodbye, what he regrets the most is not telling her how she felt when he had the chance. Not that he himself had fully realized it back then, but he really wishes he had.

“Goodnight, Luce,” he says quietly, taking a step back as her hand leaves his face and she only nods, watching as he leaves her bedroom and back to the living room. 

Her eyes flicker to the wall with the mapping and with a soft sigh she slips back into her own bed.

_ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’re just going to assume Happy has been out flying around for new fishies all this while, and at night, he came home and is already asleep. I couldn’t, for the life of me, figure out how to write him into such serious scenes :P
> 
> Before tying up the romance arc, I felt like they needed to clear the air between them first. Most of it at least. I wanted an entire chapter for when they resolved their feelings for each other and have them focus on just that without these things getting in the way.


	7. Floodgate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm having mixed feelings about this chapter. Haters can buzz off, but those of you reading... Let me know what you think. Idk how to feel about this chapter, but this is what I'd planned and I am just: Confusion.

* * *

**_Chapter 7 - Floodgate_ **

* * *

Lucy wakes up early next morning, blinking as the sun hits her in squarely in the face. She groans, rubbing her eyes and sitting up. She recollects last night and sighs as she swings her legs off the bed. She needs to head to the guild so she could pick up a job; she would need the rent money pretty soon. 

Dragging herself to the shower, she takes a quick bath and when she steps into the living room, isn’t surprised to see Natsu and Happy still asleep on the couch. She leaves a note on the coffee table and heads to the Sabretooth guild. 

* * *

The guild is… quiet, as usual. Minerva and Yukino are lounging in the pool and she had no doubt that Sting and Rogue were still asleep. Lucy slowly walks over to the side of the pool where the girls are, and sits by the pool, feet in the water. 

“Any good jobs today?” she asks, swinging her legs lightly in the water.

Minerva shook her head, saying, “Looks like it’s one of our less busy days.”

Lucy grimaces, earning questioning looks from Minerva and Yukino. “I just want to… _ do _something today. I don’t know…”

“We can practice celestial magic and try new spells,” offers Yukino, and Lucy’s eyes brighten.

“Sounds good!”

“I’m no celestial wizard, but I could flex some muscles too,” interjects Minerva, looking at the two of them. 

“Sure, but don’t try to kill us,” jokes Lucy, making Minerva look at her indignantly. Minerva’s previous murderous tendencies had become somewhat of a running joke at the guild, and she took them well. For the most part.

“No guarantees to that,” says Minerva with a scowl, as her and Yukino get out of the pool and head to the changing room to dry off. 

As Lucy waited for her friends to come back, she feels someone come up behind her. 

“I’ll kill you if you throw me into the pool,” she says, not moving from her spot. 

She hears Sting huff before he sits down next to her. “So how’s it going?”

“Good,” says Lucy, shrugging. 

“Do you even know what I’m referring to?” asks Sting, laughing.

Lucy looks at him sheepishly as Sting shakes his head at her knowingly. “I meant with Natsu-san.”

“Oh, _ that _ ,” sighs Lucy. “Going _ great _.”

“Lucy, _ come on _,” says Sting. 

“Well, I told him about the key and… we talked,” mutters Lucy, shaking her head as Sting’s eyebrows shot up. “_ No, _ not about _ that _. It doesn’t even matter anymore and now that he’s back it’ll get better and now somehow he has this absurd idea that I-”

Sting cuts her off with a sigh. “Lucy, that’s what you said six months ago. That it’ll get better with time. But…. it hasn’t. If you want to move forward…”

“No,” she says shaking her head vehemently. “No way. Nope.”

“Lucy, Natsu-san would want to know,” he says quietly and when Lucy starts to protest again... “But if _ you _don’t want to, that’s fine,” he finishes.

Lucy purses his lips and before she can say something curt, Sting changes the subject. “So, have you talked to him about joining Sabretooth yet?”

“Er, no.” She knows something has to be done because _ honestly _ what next? It’s something they haven’t talked about yet, and she knows she should bring that up soon, but she was still _ afraid _and she hates that. But she has to. She sighs. “But I will.”

“What?” she asks slowly, looking at his face.

“I know you said no already, but… if you wanna leave with him I would understand. No, just hear me out, okay? I just… I know what Fairy Tail meant to you. And I know how much Natsu-san means to you. He’s a little, well, dense sometimes, but he… cares for you,” says Sting with a small smile.

Lucy sighs. “I know he does. And-”

“I don’t think you realize the full extent of it,” he slowly. “I can sense his agitation when he upsets you. Like the night you went on your “errand”. And the night that I got you back home at Crocus. He looked so upset. And… he was _ not _ happy with the fact that I was changing you into your pajamas,” he pauses as he debates his next words for a moment, but _ oh what the hell. _“In fact, I think he might have been even jealous.”

Lucy scoffs. “He’s protective, that’s all.”

“Yes, right,” nods Sting. “I’m sure that is it.”

Lucy scrunches her nose. “I’m over it. It’s fine. We’re friends. And I’ve made peace with the fact that that’s all we’ll be.”

Sting quirks an eyebrow. “Oh? Is that why you haven’t told him about us yet?”

Lucy flinches, flushing red at being caught. “Y-You don’t know that!”

Sting chortles. “Oh, I would know alright. I’m sure Natsu-san would’ve landed his fist in my face if he knew.”

“Well, _ fine _ . As I said, _ overprotective. _”

Sting rolls his eyes and refrains from making a comment. Maybe Natsu-san wasn’t the only dense one afterall. 

“I meant what I said, by the way,” he says, nudging into her shoulder. “I mean, I love having you around and everything but we’ll always be friends, you know?”

Lucy chuckles. “I know, I love being here too. Thanks, Sting.”

“Always,” he grins at her. 

“For everything,” she says. “I don’t know where I’d be without you guys.”

“Probably a mean drunk in a bar somewhere in Crocus,” he snickers, earning a swat on his shoulder. 

“You were no better,” she mumbles, and the two collapse into a comfortable silence.

It used to be this way with Natsu, Lucy reminisces with an aching fondness. But then she had to go develop feelings for him. She’d been so sure… She shakes her head, deciding that _ that _ was over. It _ had _to be.

* * *

She walks back into her apartment around lunch time, curious as to what Natsu had been upto. She’d actually expected him to show up at the guild at some point, but he hadn’t turned up. As she closes the door behind her, she can feel the silence in her apartment and there’s no sign of the dragon slayer. She feels worry gnaw at her chest as she wonders if he’d taken off again. With hasty steps, she sweeps her gaze at her apartment and notices that his stuff is still there. 

Feeling a little bit ease, she draws herself a bath, eager to clean the dirt and grime off her body. True to her word, Minerva _ had not _gone easy on her, but their battle had reached a draw. The Star Dresses were definitely powerful and as she slips into her bath, revelling in the warmth, she wonders if she should try combining two of her Star Dresses.

She’s so lost in thought that she doesn’t hear the dragon slayer return home and calling for her, before as per usual lack of “decorum” he threw open the bathroom door, startling her. She yelps and sinks into the water, her chin now bobbing over the surface of the water. 

“How many times do I have to tell you not to-” she catches herself, shaking her head. How many times would he _ not _listen to her? There’s no point. “So where have you been?”

Unabashed, he sits on the rim of the bathtub, near where her feet were submerged in the water. “Around,” he says, pausing before asking, “So what’d _ you _ today?”

“Oh, nothing much,” she shrugs. “There weren’t many jobs so I just trained with Yukino and Minerva.”

“I see,” he says, pausing before inhaling deeply to ask, “You and Sting hangout?”

When the words were out, he realizes that that was _ too _obvious. He’d wandered the streets after breakfast along with Happy, wondering how to bring it up again. Either she didn’t trust him enough with the information, which would mean that she hadn’t really forgiven him, or she didn’t want to hurt his feelings, which meant that she knew of their existence in the first place… Whichever it was, he had to know. 

She stares at him, taking in his somewhat tense before sighing. “Look, I told you, we aren’t dating,” she says, and he interrupts her with a frustrated grunt.

“Luce, you didn’t used to hide anything from me!” he says exasperated. “I don’t understand why you’re lying to me about this! I _ know _you’re… seeing each other. I heard you on the train-”

“The _ train _again,” she says, irritated now. “Weren’t you too busy being motion sick? How could you have heard-”

“I heard _ bits _…” he starts, scowling. 

“Oh, you heard _ bits _ ,” she scoffs. “ _ That _’s precise. You don’t know anything and-”

“_ Then tell me _,” he says, shifting from his position to a slouch, crossing his arms in annoyance.

She stares at him, unsurely, worrying her lower lip. She was only delaying the inevitable. There was no use denying _ that _anymore because well, she’d just have to make peace with the idea that he didn’t return her feelings. She’d just tell him, get it over with and then get over her feelings herself silently. What a plausible plan!

“Sting and I…” she starts, shifting in the water to pull her knees to her chest. She looks up at him warily, and his expression is oddly controlled. “Please don’t be mad…”

_ Why’d I say that? _

Natsu purses his lips and only nods, because that can’t be a good sign?

“We… Well, met at the bar down the…”

“Yeah, you showed it to me yesterday,” he says, once again surprising her with the odd monotone.

“Anyways, I was drinking because… you know… And he… was _ also _drinking,” she says, laughing nervously. 

Natsu cuts her off, trying not to sound bitter, as he started to stand up. “I don’t want the details of the how, Luce, it was just a yes or no question that you were lying about but now it’s sort of cleared up and-”

“No, Natsu, you don’t understand,” pleads Lucy, reaching over slightly to just lightly catch the fabric of his pants between her wet fingers. “The answer…” she sighs. “Please, just listen.”

Grudgingly, he turns around, waiting, but doesn’t sit back down. He’s struggling to keep his face impassive but he isn’t sure if he was succeeding because Lucy was not looking at him. 

“He was, well, upset over the whole Weisslogia gave him fake memories of having killed him, but he also lived with the pain of killing his father, you know? And then when the truth came out, with the dragons and everything… Weisslogia faded away before his eyes. So… you know…”

Pause.

“We were both drunk and one thing led to another and we just…. Well….. You know?” she says, finally looking up at him, the tip of her nose turning just a little red from embarrassment. 

“Oh,” is all Natsu says. 

“But… we didn’t… start seeing each other in the... typical… sense,” she says nervously, knowing she honestly had no reason to be. He shouldn’t care about it because they were _ friends _ and so _ she _shouldn’t care about telling this to him, but she did. Too much. 

Natsu’s brow furrows. “Typical sense? What the heck does _ that _mean?”

_ Okay, okay. Band aid rip. Go. _

“We started sleeping together,” she says in a rush, becoming smaller when she sees his face blanche just a little. When he doesn’t respond, she swallows thickly. “We just started… sleeping together because I suppose… that’s how we felt at ease. Dealing with.. Whatever stuff that… happened.”

“So you _ are _ seeing him?” he asks sharply. _ What is she playing at? _

Lucy stares at him. Did she have to spell it out for him? Of course, she did. Natsu wasn’t ever very quick to catch on. 

“Sting and I sleep together,” she says. “_ Slept _ ,” she corrects herself immediately. “But I don’t… we don’t feel _ that _way about each other.”

Natsu frowns in confusion, trying to process what she’d said. Realization crosses his face but he can’t decide if he should be angry or relieved. He grunts but doesn’t say anything as he turns on his heel and leaves the bathroom.

“Natsu!” calls Lucy, hurriedly staggering to her feet and grabbing a towel off the shelf to wrap around herself as she follows him. “Wait!”

He turns around, about to say something, but the words freezes in his brain as he takes in the sight of her. He growls at her instead, as she watches him in confusion, her brain utterly unable to put two and two together as she tries to understand why he was so mad. 

“Why’re you mad?” she asks lamely.

“I’m… not mad…” he huffs, still not catching her gaze and when she looks at him incredulously, he mutters, “I want to punch Sting in the face.”

Lucy laughs (in her mind) as she recollects Sting’s words from the morning, and approaches him slowly. She touches his arm warily. “Sting didn’t do anything wrong,” she says, trying to allay what she thought were his concerns. 

“I know,” he says, leaning into her touch despite himself.

“Then what is the problem, Natsu? Why are you so mad?” she asks again. 

He looks at her, the confusion etched on her face and he has the sudden urge to laugh, because yes, what is the problem, indeed. Why was he so mad. He knows she wouldn’t let it go. He also knows he can’t tell her. So he stays silent but steps away from her grip, and she looks so hurt that he wishes he hadn’t. He sighs. _ Why was this so hard? _

“A-Are you going to leave again?” she asks, voice the softest of whispers. 

He turns to look at her, shaking his head vehemently. “What? No,” he says, watching her with worry as her eyes moistened. 

“Good,” she says, blinking away her tears. “I don’t think I’ll handle it very well,” she says, trying to pass it off as a joke as she gives him a strained chuckle.

He closes the distance between them and hugs her tight, wondering what he could possibly do to convince her that he wasn’t going to leave. That he was here to stay. He inhales her fresh scent, and sighs. There’s only one way he can think of. This might end badly, and he (thinks) knows that, but it seemed like his promises of never leaving her side rang as if empty promises to her. 

“Luce, I’ll never leave again. Ever. I don’t know if I can,” he says softly. He draws back from her to tuck a stray lock of her hair behind her ear. “I… love you too much for it.”

Silence.

She gapes at him, her brain going on the fritz. She steps back from his grasp, her mind raging as she tries to debate the meaning of his actually pretty clear words. Maybe he means it in a different way, she thinks. 

Natsu sighs when she steps away. “I’m sorry, I understand if this changes things between us but… I wish they wouldn’t. I just needed you to know that I _ couldn’t _ possibly leave again because I…. love you too much and…” A floodgate of sorts opens, half because he wants to let it out and half because her lack of a response is making him nervous. “...It’s honestly okay if you don’t feel the same way. I get it, but I just needed you to know. I don’t even know when it happened, but I know I’ve loved you for a while, but I’ve _ known _ only for a few months. But now, no matter what, you’ll always be my best friend, Lucy. That won’t ever change, not unless _ you _want it to. And-”

“You idiot.” She hugs him tight, crying softly, burying her face in his chest. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So? What did you think? As I said, mixed feelings. It turned out a little sappier than I wanted, but... I DON"T KNOW UGH. SO NERVOUS. Was that okay? ONE MORE TO GO. PART 8 is FINAL! Phew. Let me know if I'm forgetting to tie up any loose-ends!


	8. Magnolia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As with everything about this fic, I'm unsure about this chapter. It's not what I had planned at the very beginning, so I'm sure you guys will feel a huge tonal change as you read this chapter. This fic was supposed to end with Natsu and Lucy realizing the other’s feelings, but not really talking about it given the tumultuous way things went, still afraid and insecure (that would’ve been more realistic I think). This would’ve been followed by Avatar Arc, after getting Gray + angst when she almost dies. They decide to talk about it later when the war was over, and then it’d slip into the canon stuff with them getting news about Makarov and MAYBE a 4-part sequel for alvarez + post alvarez, behind-the-scenes of canon, with unresolved feelings kind of vibe. 
> 
> But idk this fic sort of spun out of control and I felt like I wouldn’t be able to do it justice anymore. … Besides, pretty sure y’all would’ve come for my neck if this fic ended with them not talking about their feelings lmaoooo
> 
> Would anyone be interested in a brief(ish) one shot of how I’d originally planned to end this fic? 
> 
> Either ways, I hope you like how this fic ended.

* * *

_ **Chapter 8 - Magnolia** _

* * *

Natsu sighs when she steps away. “I’m sorry, I understand if this changes things between us but… I wish they wouldn’t. I just needed you to know that I _ couldn’t _ possibly leave again because I…. love you too much and…” A floodgate of sorts opens, half because he wants to let it out and half because her lack of a response is making him nervous. “...It’s honestly okay if you don’t feel the same way. I get it, but I just needed you to know. I don’t even know when it happened, but I know I’ve loved you for a while, but I’ve _ known _ onYou’ll always be my best friend, Lucy. That won’t ever change, not unless _ you _want it to. And-”

“You idiot.” She hugs him tight, crying softly, burying her face in his chest. “I’d never change that.”

Natsu has never felt this confused. He’d had a very either/or situation in his head; she’d either get mad, _ or _she’d be completely okay with it. The only thing that was remotely close to how he’d imagined it to play out was her calling him an idiot. 

_ “I’d never change that.” What did that mean? _

He feels her tears against his chest as they seep through his vest. He doesn’t know what to say as he just holds her and tries his best to keep his impatience in check. He hears her take a shuddering deep breath before she draws back, sniffling. 

“You mean that?” she asks, eyes puffy. 

“‘Course, I do!” he says indignantly, did she think he’d bluff about something like this.

“Then why did you wait till now!” she exclaims, face puckering as she crosses her arms against her chest, a somewhat pained expression on her face.

“I... Didn’t… I didn’t even realize it until….” he trails off, ending his sentence with a sigh. “Last year.”

“Oh,” she says softly, still somewhat wonderstruck.

“Ya know,” says Natsu, rubbing the back of his head still feeling a little confused. “I don’t know what to make of your reaction. I thought you’d be mad or-”

“Mad? Why would I be mad,” asks Lucy. “I have never been more relieved. I feel like a knot in my chest has come undone.”

“Really?” he asks in disbelief. “Why?”

“_ Why _ ?” she repeats incredulously, before saying in most obvious tone. “Because... I love you too.” Pause. Chuckle. “You really _ are _ dense. How had you not figured it out alrea-”

He cuts her off mid-sentence with a kiss. It’s chaste, almost a silent acknowledgement and a declaration. He draws back and grins at her unsurely when he sees her eyes are wide, her cheeks tinted a soft pink.

“I-” 

Natsu’s brows scrunch up in concern. “Should… I not have done that? I’m sorry, I should’ve asked first, I’m such an idiot and-”

“What, no! You’re not an idiot.” Pause. “Sometimes,” she adds with a playful smile as he looks at her indignantly. “And don’t be sorry.” Another pause before she looks up at him again, cheeks red now. “Do it again.”

* * *

Lucy watches the changing landscape quietly; her heart wasn’t in this journey, but Natsu was determined.

When she’d asked him, “What now?”, he hadn’t answered right away, but had admitted that he had no idea. She’d suggested that he join Sabretooth and on seeing his indignant face, quickly went on to say that she’d only said so because there _ had _to be some source of income or it would be difficult; they hadn’t really discussed if Natsu would live with Lucy, but she supposed it was a given. Natsu had paced frustratedly for a while before finally telling her that he wanted to go to Magnolia… See Fairy Tail. 

_ “I just want to see it once, Luce. I can’t decide right now, it doesn’t feel right. I promise I’ll think about it after.” _

And that’s how she found herself on a train to Magnolia, absent-mindedly threading her fingers through Natsu’s hair as he lay passed out on her lap. Her eyes flicker to his face and she feels lighter than she’s had in months. If she’d been told last week that she would be here right now, she would have laughed mockingly. Even on the day that Natsu had returned, she didn’t think that this was where she would be. But she was glad she was. 

Her best friend loved her and the thought still leaves a warm, bubbly feeling in her stomach.

Of course everything isn’t magically okay now. Wounds take time to heal, but they’d do it together. He’d promised her help in looking for the Aquarius’s key, but she somehow doubted that they would have time for that anytime soon. There’s still so much to be done. Her eyes flicker to his bandaged arm. _ Igneel’s flames _, he’d said, but she still has no clue as to what he could possibly have meant. 

She finds her mind wandering as she worries about the impending battle with Zeref and Acnologia; Natsu, she was sure, would want to leave her out of it, but no way was she sitting out, not after everything that had happened. Idly, she wonders if maybe they could get all the legal guilds to form an alliance. She knows Crime Sorciere would participate willingly. Even Sabretooth. Mass mobilisation might be the only-

Her thoughts are broken by the sound of the train whistling, announcing it’s arrival at the Magnolia Station. She feels her heart get just a tad heavy as she touches Natsu’s forehead, gently pressing it to wake him up, before rubbing Happy’s ears to awaken him. They wake up stifling a yawn, Natsu a bit pale, and follow a quiet Lucy out of the train. 

She shivers a little as she drinks in the surroundings, and despite herself, memories of the times they’d started their journey for a mission in the station fill her mind. She sighs to herself softly, and prepares herself for what she was sure would be a mentally exhausting trip down memory lane. 

She feels Natsu slips his hand into hers quietly, warm and calloused, and she tightens her fingers around his. Not much is said between them as they walk down the cobblestone road, both of them automatically making note of the changes in the streets and categorising them according to whether or not they were a fan of the change that had inevitably come after the destruction caused during the battle with Tartaros.

Erza’s favourite bakery had undergone a renovation. 8-Island had shifted to a quieter street. The Dolphin Fountain on the Petunia Crosswalk was no longer there. There was new bridge built over the canal near the diner the team frequented. 

_ Sigh. _

Both of them came to a stop at the road that led up to Fairy Tail. Down this road was where once the guild stood, but now, wooden beams were erected in the front to ward off strangers apparently, which Lucy finds quite peculiar because what would the beams would even be protecting. 

“What the hell?” she hears Natsu mutter and turns to look at him to see his nose scrunched as he sniffs the air with bafflement and concentration.

“Natsu?” asks Happy as Lucy watches him with concern. 

Both their confusion deepen when they see his frown smoothen and he starts to grin. Gripping her hand tighter, he cackles in excitement, breaking into a run as he drags Lucy behind him. 

“Natsu, what is going on?” she asks, struggling to keep up with the dragon slayer as he runs down the road towards where Fairy Tail once stood. 

“You’re going to love this Luce!” he says, and she can hear his smile and Happy has already zoomed over towards their destination, curious. 

They come to a halt in front of the wooden beams, and while Lucy tries to catch her breath, Natsu looks around only briefly to look for a way behind the beams before lighting his fist on fire and punching through it. It leaves a gaping hole in the beams, smoke starting to rise up as the wood starts to crack to make a bigger opening. 

Lucy’s words of reprimand die in her throat when she looks through hole to see many familiar, but startled faces. There’s a second of silence and Natsu merely greets them casually as he pulls Lucy after him as they step in through the whole. And then, there’s chaos. 

“Juvia is glad Natsu-san and Love Rival are okay.”

"You two really are idiots. Do you know how worried we were?"

“You can’t just leave a gigantic message at the _ palace _of all places and not show up here!”

“Leave it to Flame Brain damage an already damaged property.”

“This is the third time I’ve had to rebuild that fence since we started!”

“Where the hell have you two been!”

* * *

Ten minutes of chaotic reunion later, everyone’s exchanging their stories. 

“I oughta arrest your ass, Salamander,” scowls Gajeel. “The Domus Flau _ and _the palace… Do you know how much property you damaged? The Magic Council is outraged…”

“Since when do _ you _care about that shit?” asks Natsu indignantly. 

“Since I started working for them,” he says, keeping the scowl on his face before smirking. “But you did scare them good though. You should've seen the old man's face when news reached the council.”

And it went on.

“I’m sorry, I never responded to your messages, Lucy,” sighs Erza at some point. “We were in the middle of infiltrating a dark guild and I didn’t want to put you at risk.”

“Yeah,” agrees Gray. “We thought you’d left with Pyro here so we didn’t really…” he trails away with a grunt, rubbing the back of his head.

Lucy feels Natsu’s hands tense in her grip, and she squeezes reassuringly before leaning over and planting a gentle kiss on his cheek. A corner of his lips raises in a smile, and he is about to lean to kiss her lips, oblivious to the sudden quiet at the makeshift table they were sitting on.

“I see Natsu finally stopped being an idiot,” giggles Mira, breaking the silence. 

“_ Hey _ !” retorts Natsu before conceding. “True, but it’s not like _ she _did something about it.”

“Hm, I suppose you’re right,” says Erza with a smile. 

“Both of you grew brain cells, huh? Who would’ve thought,” says Gajeel, faux annoyance write on his face. 

“Shut up, Metal Head.”

Naturally, he’s awarded with a punch to the face and the two of them start a brawl, that many guild members partake in pretty soon. The familiarity of it all feels so warm that even Erza watches in amusement. 

Even when conversation breaks out again, Lucy doesn’t say much, just revelling in where she was. She just watches her friends talk (and fight) and feels like she can finally breathe. Deep, full breaths. Her gaze sweeps the area, now a construction site as the guild works towards rebuilding their guild hall. There’s much work to be done, and they had to find Master Makarov first and foremost. A long journey to an entirely different continent lay ahead. Change was in the air, more of it. She knows there a war's coming. 

Her gaze flickers over to Natsu, who senses her watching him and he looks up to shoot her a smile. She smiles back, giving him a small wave, and oddly out of character, he abandons the brawls he'd started, to join Lucy at the table. The girls look up, surprised but also lightly amused. His hand snakes around her waist as he pulls her further into his side as he engages Erza in a debate over the rennovations of that bakery she loved so much.

She is home, and she knew she would be able to take whatever came her way. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And with that, I finish this fic! What a wild ride!!!!! 
> 
> I want to thank all my reviewers who have enjoyed this story, as well as people who have favourited/followed this story. I love you guys, especially for being so supportive through all the hate this fic (for some strange reason, actually) garnered. I appreciate you all SO SO Much. Support means everything in this small world of fanfiction and I think all fanfic writers would agree with me that reviews/kudos/follows are currency in fanfiction world. 
> 
> I hope you liked the final chapter and think it a fitting end.
> 
> BTW I'm going to be publishing a new BFFs with Benefits kind of a fic REAL soon (2-3 days?) I hope I see you all there!!

**Author's Note:**

> So I feel like I should clarify that while there will be angst, it won't be from a love triangle. I originally wanted to write it as Lucy/Sting being in an actual relationship when Natsu showed up, but I didn't want hurt bb Sting. I liked the idea of him being protective because of a platonic friendship more than being jealous over a romantic rival. As for the 'f*** buddies' angle, it was just something I wanted to throw in to piss off Natsu further and also to give Lucy somewhat of a coping mechanism so she wouldn't feel like shit. It may not make sense, I get it, but um, it be like that in this fic, I suppose. Pls don't hate me.


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